Friday, August 15, 2008

The Scary Place

There is one place in Australia that I don't like.


Simple reason.

It's evil.

It looks lovely from far away.

Who couldn't love an amusement park?

But when you get close up, you realize you have to walk through an evil looking clown to get to the rides.

What the hell is THAT all about?

For those who are lost, I'm talking about Luna Park in Sydney.

That place is just plain wicked.

There's something sinister there.

The first time we went....not so bad.

We felt relatively safe and secure--creeped out in a fun way. So we came back.

This time Jack got injured on the big slide. A slight little ouch. We thought it was a fluke and he got bravely back on the horse. The second injury was enough to bring tears from Jack and a decision from both of us. No more slide.

We then watched as other children were injured. Something was happening towards the end of the slide....the children were catching on something. Maybe a sticky spot? The burlap rugs had too many holes? Instead of having enough momentum to go down the big humps of the slide, they stopped and slid in a weird fashion.

One young teenager came out of the experience limping and crying.

I tried talking to the staff. None of them would listen to me.

We left the funhouse and then went on one last ride on the Ferris Wheel. I had never liked Ferris Wheels before. You know... the whole heights thing. But I figured I had climbed the Harbor Bridge. I'm brave now! Then suddenly I was sitting there high up in the air and I thought, if the slide has a malfunction why not the Ferris Wheel?

Time to fake a smile for Jack's sake while praying fervently.

We survived.

Okay, the other thing about Luna Park.... If the clown in the entrance isn't frightening enough, there's these carnival games with really creepy clowns. You throw balls into their mouth.

Tonight, we watched Mcleod's Daughters and they had the same clowns.

I turned to Tim and said. It must be an Australia thing.

What is it with the clowns, people???


My only guess is that Australians have never seen the movie Poltergeist. Okay? Go watch that movie and you will see why clowns are sinister evil creatures. They are not to be trusted. Nor should we ever be asked to walk inside their mouth!

As an American with a strong interest in Australia, I now have two goals.

1. Find an Australian to buy back Vegemite so it's not owned by an evil American Corporation

2. Remove all clowns from Australian amusement parks.

Come on! Come up with something better. Something that says Australia. How about a giant Koala mouth? Or a Wombat? A Duck Billed Platypus might be cute.

No more clowns!


  1. Coulrophobia- the abnormal or exaggerated fear of clowns. (according to wikipedia)

    I too fear the clowns. Nothing good can come of them. I have my own childhood encounters, mostly birthday parties gone bad, a few amusement park encounters, and one very vivid memory of an evil laughing clown I dreamt of.

    I know I have no rational reason to walk 30 extra steps to avoid them, but I will, and I don't feel bad about it.

  2. Darcy.

    Yikes about the evil clown dream.

    Pretty scary.

    Was just thinking....Dumbo probably also contributes to the fear of clowns. They were pretty mean to the little elephant.

  3. LMAO
    Luna Park in Sydney(and Melbourne) is based on the Luna Park from Coney Island in America!
    The sideshow and fun house have long gone from Melbourne's Luna Park but I remember flying down those slides on the hessian as a kid - if your heels hung over the edge you got a friction burn like nothing else *ouch*

  4. Jayne,

    Oh don't go trying to blame America!!!

    No, joking. I knew it was related. I bought one of those little mini books about Luna Park. Well, and also the slide itself was in a building called Coney Island Fun House (or something like that)

    We've actually been to Luna Park in Coney Island. It's as creepy as the one in Sydney. Actually, it's probably more creepy. There's just something eerie about Coney Island itself. But eerie in a fun way.

    Another great amusement park like that is the Boardwalk in Santa Cruz California. It's where The Lost Boys was filmed. We went when my sisters and I were teens. We thought it was the coolest thing.

  5. Yes, Luna Park is totally freaky. We haven't been back there since you left... we're saving it for your return, haha.

    And what's the difference between the American corporations and the Australian ones?

  6. I agree, the clown is creepy. All clowns are creepy!

    I do like the pretty, shiny lights on the harbour when you go there at night though.

    Plus, it's the only local permanent amusement park left so it's that or nothing, unfortunately.

  7. Laura,

    I like Australian corporations better because they give more vacation time. Although that's mandated by the government.

    I was disturbed/saddened though to hear that Australia is (or is planning) to now offer the option of more pay instead of all that holiday time.

    I think traditionally Australian corporations had less of a workaholic atmosphere, but that might be changing.

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  9. Catatonic Kid,

    I agree with you. It's very beautiful looking at it from the harbor.

    We often wondered what it would be like to live in one of those buildings right next to Luna Park. It looks like you'd have ride vehicles going across your window.

  10. Actually good thing to wonder about, Dina. The 'neighbours' of Luna Park have spent years and years protesting about the noise and trying to get the roller coaster shut down.

    Periodically they win an appeal and there's no roller coaster, which means the whole park shuts down of course. Then they lose another appeal (ie. a park owner successfully bribes someone) and the Park starts up again. It's all rather ridiculous and funny at this point!

  11. Catatonic Kid,

    I remember hearing that it has opened and closed a lot....changed owners and all that.

    I wonder what the roller coaster would sound like from inside the apartments!!

  12. hello :)

    Google the Melbourne Luna Park and have a look at their's the creepy one!

    I've always thought the Sydney one was quite fun and welcoming - I love looking across the harbour and seeing him there.

  13. Gina,

    I'll google it.

    I think I found the Sydney clown a LITTLE creepy before Jack got hurt.

    Then after he got hurt, I saw the whole thing as very sinister.

    Okay and now I'm terrified of amusement parks. Yesterday I found myself on a website about amusement park accidents. I didn't realize all the danger!!!

  14. LOL, I remember seeing this picture when you emailed all the photos to us. It's still scary!!

  15. Beccaelf,

    I'm just trying to give you nightmares!!!

    What have you been up to?

    I have to go read your blog and find out.... I checked a few weeks ago and it seems you don't post that often anymore.

  16. I try to post once-twice a week.

    I do have it as friends-only. And I still have you listed as a friend, but you don't have me (or anyone) listed. I don't know if that affects how you can view my posts?

    My boss had her baby a month early, but everything is ok. No good coworker stories lately!

  17. I can still see your posts since you have me listed as a friends.

    I went and read this morning......

  18. Yes Clowns Are Evil Why?

    Because They..........

    A.Destroy A Circus (.The One In Fort Worth)

    B........................Kill Them

    C.Well You Like Them!