Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Barukh Sheim K'vod Malkhuto L'olam Va'ed

Here's one of my dreams from last night....

I've kept my Jewishness secret from people.  But then there's this place, or building, that someone is going to go visit.  I want to go too, but they say that only Jews are allowed.  I then reveal that I'm Jewish.  To my dismay, they don't believe me.  I have to prove it.   I try to do so by reciting The Shema.  They're not too impressed.   They say anyone could have learned that.  I'm thinking the second verse might impress them, but I can't remember it (But I DID remember it when I woke up!).   Then someone says I need to sing the kookaburra song.   I say, "That's not Jewish!  It's Australian".

I think I know the reasons behind some of this dream.   It probably all began when Tim, Jack, and I were driving back from Halloween in Dallas, and we heard THIS song.    I thought I remembered that the song had something to do with our wedding, but I couldn't remember what.   So, I took out the old wedding videos, and watched them.   All I could find was that in the recap video, they played the song at the beginning.  I'm not sure it was actually played at the wedding.   It probably was though.

Anyway, I watched the wedding video and it really made me miss Matthew, my best friend from my last year of college.   So, I've had him on my mind, and in my heart.  I met Matthew at the Synagogue one Friday night.   I was going through a religiousness stage, and he was thinking of converting.   We became best friends, and  a large percentage of our social life was Jewish-related.  We attended services together.   For some holidays, local Jewish families would invite us over to their house.    Then our big falling out kind of  happened over Judaism as well.  We stopped talking for awhile, and that's when Tim entered my life.

Later, Matthew and I made up.  He and his boyfriend came to visit us in NYC, and he came to our wedding.  He was one of the witnesses, and signed the Ketubah.    Tim and I have no idea where our Ketubah is now. Maybe we'll find it someday.

That was the last time I saw Matthew.  I think we exchanged a few emails or letters; then we lost track of each other. I google his name every so often, but I never have much luck.  

As for the Kookaburra part of the dream?   What was that all about?    Maybe it was telling me that Matthew and Judaism is my past.   Australia is my present.   I'd love it if Matthew was in my present though.  Judaism can stay behind....for the most part.