Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Vanity and Ugliness

Today I've been watching clips on the Australian Screen website from a show called Fashionista.    I just watched a clip about a hairstylist: Nicolas Jurnjack.   Towards the end of the clip, he talks about the importance of lighting in modeling and photography. You can have a beautiful model with perfect hair, and great clothes.  But if you don't have the right lights, she won't look so hot.

That makes me feel better about my own looks. Jack took a video of me yesterday, and I looked REALLY ugly.  No, you can't see it.   I deleted it.  Anyway, that was ONE of the reasons I was depressed yesterday.  There were other reasons too, of course.  If it was just the video, I'd be extremely vain.  

Now I'm thinking maybe it was just bad lighting, or whatever.   And maybe he was too close-up.   I guess I'm getting to that age where I'm going to prefer the camera not get so close.  I hate that.  I wanted to be one of those who grow old gracefully. I didn't want to be all vain and worried about aging. 

And it's really stupid to worry about how you look.  Tomorrow, I could get in a scary accident, and be terribly disfigured.  But maybe I'd be lucky and still be kind of cute....like Joseph Merrick. 

I just checked something, and realized something else that makes me feel better.  I wanted to see if I DO look hideous close-up.  So I used Photo Booth on my computer.   I am always highly disappointed in how I look in those photos. I think I look good, then I snap the photo, and I get something awful.   But now I see that it's the flash that does me in.  When I just look at myself on the screen, I look okay. But when the flash goes off, and the picture is taken...YUCK.

In other news. GOOD news....Tim's gift certificate for me finally showed up.   I was going to wait and buy books at a later date.   But I changed my mind.   

I'm reading a great book right now.  It's not Australian, but that's okay.   It's The Passage by Justin Cronin.   So far, it reminds me of The Stand.   And it also has a zombie-like element to it....similar to I am Legend.   There are vampires in the story, but they're not like Edward, Bill, Eric, or Lestat.