Friday, January 22, 2016

Kidnapping, Apologies, Stalkers, and Assholes

1. Saw that the James Packer Mariah Carey is engaged to is the Australian James Packer.

I saw the news yesterday, but was too busy, tired, or lazy to read it. I considered that it could be part an Australian Packer, but I figured it wasn't.

Well, it turns out it is.

2. Guessed that James Packer is the son of Kerry Packer.

3. Saw, from Lord Wiki, that I'm right.

4. Read an article that says Kevin Rudd is being considered for the top job at the UN.

That's pretty exciting.

5. Started to watch an episode of Wicked Science.

6. Talked with Tim about how Australia and the US are evil with all their kidnappings and racist crimes.

Of course, these counties aren't the only ones who have committed wrongs.

We talked about how the Australia and UK have made formal apologies for some of their misdeeds.

Has the US?  For slavery? What they did to the Native Americans?  I mean tons of individuals have shown remorse. But how about the  government itself?

7. Found an article.

It says Clinton apologized for the slave trade.  That's good.  Maybe. It said he apologized in Africa.  To Africans?  That's fine. But the government needs to apologize to the descendants of slaves here.

8. Found an editorial that agrees with me.

An apology needs to be directed at black Americans.

9. Concluded that, like the US; Australia, Japan, Germany, the UK, etc. have committed heinous crimes against humanity. But at least their governments have had the strength and decency to apologize.

10. Liked that, on Wicked Science, Elizabeth (Bridget Neval) is showing evidence that she might stop being so wicked and instead become a team player.

Is there a chance she may become one of my favorite type of characters—evil ones turned good?

Maybe.

I have a feeling, though, that at this point it's false hope.  I'm guessing we're being shown a glimpse of her ability to be decent, but she'll go back to being wicked for awhile.

I'm only on the sixth episode (out of 26 for the season). I'm thinking that's too early to have such major character growth—especially since Elizabeth is the main villain.  I think bad guys are more likely to quickly turn good if they're not the central and/or only villain.

11. Started watching an episode of Home and Away.

12. Thought of how I'd want to respond to Stalker-Ryan's statement to Phoebe (Isabella Giovinazzo).

He says, What sort of fan would I be if I just let you walk away?

What I'd want to say is, Uh...maybe a non-Annie Wilkes kind of fan?  A mentally stable one?

13. Thought about things while watching the confrontation scene between stalker and victim.

I'm wondering if it would help, in these situations, to call people out on what they are.

The fan is a stalker and he's planning to kidnap Phoebe.  She tries gentle tactics to save herself first, and then begins screaming.  She never, though, accuses him of being a stalker or kidnapper.

I'm just wondering if such labeling might help in cases where someone is committing a crime because of delusions.

Stalker-Ryan sees himself as a helpful fan who's going to rescue Phoebe.  I think he's in denial about being a scary, creepy criminal.  Maybe it would help if she pointed it out to him?

14. Wondered if there'd be a worry that calling someone a stalker might send them over the edge. Maybe it would make stalkers more angry and dangerous.

15. Continued to think the Oscar (Jake Speer) and Maddie (Kassandra Clementi) storyline is ridiculous.

Oscar is avoiding Maddie, because he has feelings for her and doesn't trust her feelings for him.  That might be kind of reasonable IF Maddie wasn't in the hospital enduring chemo.

As I've said before, I don't think someone should be obligated to stick by a sick person's side if there's no love between them. But if there is love?  It's crazy and stupid for there to be any avoidance.

16. Thought that it might make some sense if the healthy person has a fear of illness. It's not an admirable trait, but some people do shy away from cancer and things like that.

But avoiding someone you love with cancer, because you're afraid they only love you because of their cancer?  That just seems very silly to me.

If I was Maddie, I'd probably never forgive Oscar.

16. Saw Phoebe question her reaction to the stalker in the morning.

She asks a policewoman if she had overreacted.

Fortunately, the policewoman was decent enough to assure her she didn't.

I've never been in a severe situation like that. But there have been times where I feel I've been wronged by someone. I get angry—react. Or I just feel anger and resentment.  Then often, I question if I have a right to feel that way. Could it be that I wasn't wronged?  Could it be that I was actually the person in the wrong?

Sometimes what I've done to put things in perspective is imagine the same thing happening to someone else—maybe one of my sisters or a TV character.  Would I be on their side or the other person's side?

17. Thought more about this exercise, and decided I should do it more often. It really is helpful.

I just pictured various things that have annoyed, hurt, and angered me. Then I imagined characters on Coronation Street doing them.  With some of the actions, it made me see it's really not a big deal. If I saw a character on Coronation Street do it, I'd think it was probably funny, and understandable.  Then with another thing, imagining a character doing it made me see the character as a major asshole.

18. Decided bad behavior can be divided into three types A) Funny asshole-behavior B) evil asshole-behavior c) scary asshole-behavior.

I think stalker Ryan's behavior would be in the C category.

19. Realized I needed to add another category. So....D) dumb asshole-behavior. That would be for the way Oscar acted towards Maddie.

20. Thought that some behaviors aren't easy to label and their placement would be determined by frequency and intent.

If Stalker-Ryan continues to pursue and terrorize Phoebe, then that behavior would be evil-asshole behavior.  

21. Wondered if I'd need a category for selfishness or greed.

I think I'll skip it. I think most of that can be put in either the funny or dumb group.

22. Changed my mind.

I need a selfishness-asshole category. Maybe I'd just call it narcissistic-asshole behavior.

23. Went to the Tropfest website.

Today will begin my adventures with the 2009 finalists.

I've already twice watched one of the films—"Being Carl Williams".  I don't think I'll watch it again.

I thought it had won, because it's icon photo is the one used as the link for the 2009 finalists. But I Googled, and saw another film had won.

24. Clicked on "The News". It has an actor familiar to me, but I forget his name. He was on Love My Way, and other things.  

25. Started watching the film. It's four minutes, which surprised me. Almost all the 2008 movies were seven minutes.

26. Felt the behavior of the guy in the movie would be classified as scary-asshole.

27. Saw the name of the actor in the credits. It's Damon Herriman.

28. Wanted to say that I liked the movie.

29. Went to the website of Luke Shanahan, the guy who wrote and directed "News".  He doesn't have much listed on IMDb, but I'm imagining he might have done stuff beyond what's there.

30. Saw that Shanahan has various videos on his site. Some are short film, and I think some are commercials.

31. Watched Shanahan's Wrigley's commercial.  It's cute.  The accents are American.  Either it was made for the US, or it's one of those commercials where the company tries to use foreign accents to sell something.

32. Started to watch a music video by Shanahan.

There's a guy tied up and gagged in a bathtub.  I think he's another victim of scary-asshole behavior.

33. Thought the video was very dark, creepy, and unsettling.

It definitely didn't have a happy ending.

34. Followed the link to Luke Shanahan's Twitter.

35. Learned that Shanahan is working on a feature film called Rabbit.   I also saw the title mentioned on his website, but wasn't sure what it referred to.

36. Saw that there's a Twitter account for the movie...or really, the production company (alongshotfilm) It doesn't give me much information.

I followed the link on Twitter to alongshotfilm's website. That's overly mysterious as well.

37. Saw from this website that Rabbit is about a girl looking for her kidnapped twin sister.

I think Shanahan might have a thing for stories involving scary-asshole behavior.

38. Wanted to talk more about my asshole divisions.

I have some much stuff swimming in my head.

First, I'm going to change the narcissistic- asshole behavior to greedy-asshole behavior.

I have a hard time spelling narcissistic. But that's not all. I think greedy can encompass a larger range of behaviors.  A spouse who plays Sims 4 all day and doesn't help with the housework or childcare is being greedy with relaxation and leisure.  Your aunt who ate too much vanilla custard and didn't leave enough for everyone else was being greedy with gluttony.  The person who talks too much and/or brags too much is being greedy for attention.

We can also be greedy with money, sex, material goods, opportunities, and other things I can't think of right now.

39. Decided possessiveness with other people would be love-greed.

I'm a greedy asshole to Tim when I make it known that I want our cat to sit only on my lap and not his. I don't want to share the cat love.  I'm not bad enough to pull Max over to my lap, but I do give a few pouty looks.

40. Wanted to explain more about scary-asshole behavior.

This involves moments of insanity and/or loss of control.  It can range from throwing a glass of wine at your lover in a fancy restaurant to shooting your husband's mistress.

I think we all have scary asshole behavior, but fortunately we don't all have the high end murder/stalker type stuff.

41. Thought about evil-asshole behavior.

What separates it from other asshole behavior is the asshole actually experiences sustained joy from the misdeed.

Now I think sometimes other asshole behavior brings short-term contentment.  There's a feeling of satisfaction, especially if we're acting out on revenge.  If guilt, embarrassment, or regret doesn't eventually replace the satisfaction, then I'd probably classify it as evil-asshole behavior.

42. Thought Elizabeth's actions on Wicked Science is a good example of evil-asshole behavior.  She does things to purposely cause people trouble, and she seems to greatly enjoy it.

43. Saw an asshole-behavior on Coronation Street, and I don't know which category it fits into.

It's a fairly common thing, so it's not like I can just skip over it in my categorizing.

The behavior I'm thinking about is responding to someone's friendly or benign statement with a harsh remark. If the asshole enjoys seeing the other person hurt, it could be evil-asshole behavior.

Maybe in most cases, it would be scary-asshole behavior.  I think a lot of times people are experiencing a temporary loss of control when they say these things.  It's like we don't want to be mean, but we can't help ourselves.

44. Figured it could also be put into the greedy-asshole behavior. Maybe it's wittiness-greed?  Our desire to feel clever surpasses our desire to be kind.

45. Decided saying mean things could also be about power-greed.

Let's say a child draws a picture and shows it to her cousin. If the cousin says, That's ugly, she may be trying to weaken her cousin's confidence and self-worth.  For some, making another person feel weak is a way of making themselves feel powerful.

46. Decided insults could also be about attention-greed.  If we feel someone else is about to steal too much of the limelight, we may try to take it away from them. by cutting them down to size.

47. Thought about how greedy-asshole behavior can come in surprising forms.

One such form is the need-to-be-needed greedy-asshole behavior. With this behavior, the person gives money or gifts, or they provide services to an excessive degree.  More importantly, they give with an attitude of smugness. There's an implied message that the recipients of their generosity are inferior.

Also, people engaging in this flavor of greedy-asshole behavior will often fail to notice and/or acknowledge the contribution of others.  If she's pushed to notice, she will find reason to dismiss the contribution, or try to take credit for it.

48. Thought since my fiction-writing career hasn't zoomed off in wonderful directions, maybe I can make a career out of writing dogmatic, narrow-minded pop psychology books.

I still get annoyed with the five love language theory books, because my love language isn't included.

I figure someone will read this and see that I failed to include the type of asshole-behavior that plagues their life.  I apologize to them in advance.