John Farrow, Feeling Evil, Maddie and Oscar's First Date, and Dimitri Ellerington

1. Had a fun time-traveling dream.

I push through our bedroom window and end up in a family's house, in the 1960's or 1970's. I talk to a woman about when I'm from—or at least I try to. I have trouble remembering things.

We try to have a conversation about Doctor Who. She tells me her doctor is played by a William something. I tell her the names of more recent doctors but can only remember first names. When I get to the David one, the only name that I can get out of my brain is David Koresh. I then try to tell her a bit about the Waco event but don't get very far.

We get onto the conversation of the current US president. I struggle to remember who our president is. I tell myself it's the fault of all the 2016 campaigning. The candidates have overshadowed the actual president.

Then I remember. The American president is Julia Gillard. I'm a bit shocked and disappointed in myself for forgetting. How could I have forgotten a president who's Australian!

A moment or so later, I start realizing I must have things wrong. US presidents need to be born in the US, so Julia Gillard can't be the right answer.

2. Remembered that Mia Farrow has some Australian connection.

She had a cameo in one of my dreams last night, but I don't remember what it was all about.  

3. Consulted Lord Wiki.

He says Mia Farrow's father, John Farrow, was an Australian-American film director.

4. Saw that John Farrow also wrote books. One was about Father Damien; not the one who fought Regan's demon but the one who lived among lepers.

5. Learned that Farrow won a best screenplay Oscar for Around the World in 80 Days.

6. Googled and learned that there's another Australian celebrity named John Farrow.  

He's an athlete—a skeleton racer.

What's a skeleton racer?

I'm picturing a snow thing.

7. Realized I'm picturing a snow thing, because Google has a photo of John Farrow wearing winter clothes. 

8. Learned from Lord Wiki that skeleton racing is a snow-sliding type sport.

9. Learned there's a cyclone named Stan coming to Western Australia.

I hope he tries to be gentle.

10. Started watching an episode of Wicked Science. 

11. Disturbed that I'm finding myself relating to Elizabeth.

It's not her desire to do evil (Fortunately) or her magnificent brain power (unfortunately).

It's more about her being rejected and feeling she has to rely on herself.

I also feel I have a low tolerance for the behavior of most other people.

Humanity annoys me. And it seems to me this is the beginning of the makings of a villain.  

Maybe I'll end up a Batman villain.

12. Decided I'd rather be a Farscape villain. 

Maybe I'll have an affair with Scorpius.  

13. Reminded myself that there's a part of me that actually adores people. So maybe I will manage to stay on the side of good.

14. Decided I have a love-hate relationship with the human race.

As long as it doesn't turn into a full-hate relationship, I'm probably okay.

15. Decided to cut myself some slack.

Humans ARE pretty damn awful.  If someone doesn't have any negative feelings towards our species, they're probably in denial.

16. Started watching an episode of Home and Away.

17. Had a feeling Maddie (Kassandra Clementi) isn't going to be pleased with Spencer's (Andrew J. Morley) fun run for cancer.

In the pre-episode flashback segment, they show the scene with Maddie saying she's tired of people talking to her about cancer so much.  I think they're reminding us of what she said, so we'll understand why she's angry later. 

18. Thought the first date between Maddie and Oscar (Jake Speer) was very sweet.

Oscar confesses that he's fantasized about the date for a long time. When he says he wishes they were in a universe where he was a less a geek and she didn't have cancer, Maddie says she's happy with the universe.

She's saying that her happiness with Oscar outweighs the badness of the cancer. 

That's really lovely. I'm even having some teary eyes.

19. Thought about how long time crushes can be very sweet, very sad, or downright scary.

20. Decided long-time crushes are sweetest when it eventually turns into mutual love.

They're saddest when the person ends up putting their life on hold. If a crush paralyzes someone—keeps them from moving forward; that's not good.

They're scary when the crush turns into stalker-behavior.  I don't mean stalker as in checking someone's Facebook three or four times a day. I'm talking severe delusions of mutual love, showing up on the person's doorstep, kidnapping, murdering, etc.  

21. Started to maybe understand Oscar's reluctance to get int a relationship with Maddie.

I thought he was being ridiculous—hesitating with her, because he believed she was only loving him because of her cancer.  I think maybe that was just an excuse.

I think the truth is, it's sometimes hard to go from fantasy to reality.

If we dream of having something and then it becomes available to us, it might be hard to adjust to that.  

There also might be a sense that it's a trick from the universe. It's dangling in front of us, but if we reach out to grab it, the universe will zap it away.

22. Felt sorry for Maddie, because Oscar is being overly careful with her. She wants to have fun. He wants her to be a proper cancer patient and take it easy.

But then I decided that's better than her being with an asshole who doesn't take her cancer seriously and pushes her to do more than she should.

A balanced attitude would be the best, but if I had to choose between the two, I'd rather have the overprotective one.

23. Read more of The Rosie Project.

I'm liking it.

The guy in the book is trying to find a partner and is using a picky questionnaire to find his perfect partner.

I think the idea of the story is he shouldn't be so picky. He should compromise and lower his standards.

Personally, I don't think it's a bad idea to be picky.  If you're already in love; then drop the standards. You might as well go with your feelings. But if you're looking for someone, why continue testing out someone who already doesn't meet up to your standards?

In the book, the guy's standards are mostly about superficial things—acceptable BMI, not vegan, no- smoking, not late, not picky about ice-cream flavors, etc.  

If I was making a list about deep things, it would probably be quite long. I could probably write a book on that. In fact, if one would go through my blog and cut out all I've already said on the topic, it would probably equal a whole series of books.  

When reading The Rosie Project, though, I wondered what would be my superficial things (IF I wasn't already married)

No smoking would probably be number one.  

Since I have a phobia of vomiting, I'd not do well with someone who has a strong gag reflex.  I also wouldn't want someone who gets drunk to the point of vomiting or takes food risks that would increase their chance of getting food poisoning.

On that note, I've become quite a germaphobe, so I'd probably want someone equal to me in that regard. If they're too less of a germaphobe than me, that will make me anxious. If they're much more of a germaphobe than me; then that will be really annoying. I mean I'm quite bad. So if they're much worse than me, that might be very extreme.

Last, but not least....

I have an aversion to tuna fish salad and mayonnaise, so I'd prefer someone who doesn't eat those things on a regular basis.  

24. Started watching a 2009 Tropfest finalist film.

It's called "Dream What You Want"

Sometimes I wish I could dream what I wanted to dream. But for the most part, I love the dreams given to me.

25. Wondered if this film is actually about a dream.

That would be cool. 

26. Got idea that it probably is a about a dream.

Strange things are happening.

27. Realized the title is probably literal.

The film seems to be about lucid dream control.

28. Thought about how I like being lucid in my dreams. I don't care much about having control.  I think if I had too much control, it wouldn't feel like a dream. It would feel like a very vivid fantasy.

29. Thought that I'd like enough control to be able to travel where I want to travel.

Last night I tried to get somewhere in my dream, and the journey was horribly slow and tedious. I wish I had enough control to have dream teleportation—or at least a super fast, flying car. 

However, once I got to where I want to go, I wouldn't want to decide what happens there or who's there. I certainly wouldn't want to have to come up with the dialogue.  

30. Saw that Dimitri Ellerington has been second unit director or assistant director on many projects.

I forget what those things are. Or I might not have ever known.

31. Thought that maybe the second unit director is the person who gets the shots that do not contain the storyline.  

32. Googled and saw that I'm actually right.

Go, me!

I'm so proud.

The second unit director gets the supplementary footage.

So...anyway.  

Dimitri Ellerington did this for The Babadook.  Looking again at his filmography, though, it seems he usually is the first assistant director.  I don't know what that is.  

33. Got the definition from IMDb. They have a glossary—didn't know that.

It seems the first assistant director does a lot of work with scheduling. Honestly, it doesn't sound like a very fun and creative job. 

Actually, it would probably be fun for someone who is into making lists and planning—someone who is very organized. 

I'd feel bad for a person who is stuck working in the job as a stepping stone for their own directing career.  It's probably great for an aspiring director to take on the job for a few projects. I'm sure it's very educational. But if they had to do it for a long time, I imagine they'd get frustrated.

34. Wondered about Ellerington. He's done a few short films, but it seems mostly he does assistant director work.  Is he happy with that?

I can picture two scenarios. In one he wants to direct his own full-length films but hasn't managed to get a project together. OR he's very happy with being an assistant director but sometimes likes to try his hand at directing short things.  

35. Saw that Alan Flowers, the star of "Dream What You Want" recently appeared in a movie called Psychoanalysis.  It's a comedy (presumably dark) with this premise:  When a psychologist loses five clients to suicide in a one week period he becomes obsessed with the idea that they were murdered by a rival psych.

It sounds interesting to me.

36. Watched the trailer for Psychoanalysis.

I think IMDb got it wrong about it being a comedy.

Well, they say it's a comedy-drama, but it looks much more like a drama.

37. Saw that Alan Flowers played a florist on All Saints.

I thought maybe I would have seen him, but he wasn't there until season six. I've only seen the first season, and the close-to-the last season.

38. Saw that Anna Lisa Phillips, the actress in "Dream What You Want" has a very long and impressive filmography.

She was in the miniseries The Devil's Playground—the new one, not the old.

39. Learned from Lord Wiki that the new The Devil's Playground is a sequel to the old The Devil's Playground.

I'm really loving all these sequels to old things.  Or at least I love the idea of them. I don't think I've actually watched any.

40. Saw that Anna Lisa Phillips is in a horror movie about wild dogs.

According to IMDb, it's going to be released in the US on February 5.  It doesn't have a release date for Australia, although it's an Australian movie.

41. Saw that Anna Lisa Phillips is appearing in an upcoming supernatural film called Backtrack.  It's about a psychologist who learns his patients are ghosts.

One of the actors in it is Michael Whalley. I just saw him on the cast list of the OTHER psychologist movie.

So Alan Flowers and Anna Lisa Phillips have two links that I know about. First they both starred in "Dream What You Want". Second, they both appeared in a 2015 psychology-related film with Michael Whalley.  

42. Watched the trailer for Backtrack.

It looks like a good movie.

I'm wondering if it's a ghost movie or if it's a maybe-ghost movie.

It might be one of those movies where you have to try to figure out if someone is seeing ghosts or if they're having hallucinations.

43. Saw that Anna Lisa Phillips played Julie in three episodes of The Secret Life of Us.

I don't remember who that is.

44. Consulted The Australian television website.

Julie was connected to Will (Joel Edgerton). She was around when he was going through his daredevil stage. I vaguely remember that.

45. Went to the Vimeo page of Dimitri Ellerington. He calls himself a freelance director.

I'm guessing he'd rather direct his own films than be the assistant on other films.

I could be wrong.

The other thing is, he could be happy doing short projects.

He might not be aspiring to make a full-length project.

46. Imagined that most directors probably want to make full-length projects.

47. Thought maybe I'm wrong.

With YouTube and all these film festivals, short films can probably be very rewarding.

48. Saw that Ellerington has a video featuring Don Hany—"The Road to Success"

I'm going to watch that.

49. Saw that the video was a trailer.

I'll have to see if the actual film is on Vimeo.

50. Found it.

51. Liked the film so far.

It's about annoying self-help books that end up causing anxiety and self-doubt rather than the success they promise.

Or at least it's what I think it's about.

The theme of this film somewhat connects to "Dream what You Want". One is about dream control; then this one is about life control.

If people can control their dreams and get what they want in their sleep; can they also control their real lives by having a positive attitude?

I don't think so.

What I'm wondering is what Dimitri Ellerington thinks about the whole thing.

52. Finished watching the film.

I like it, but I'm not sure what the message is.

I can't tell if it's in support of the positive thinking/laws of attraction mindset or against it.

So, what happens, is this guy is listening to a self help guru while trying to make breakfast.  He's trying to convince himself that he's a Ferrari type guy rather than a Ford one.  But it's hard, because he can't seem to make a simple breakfast. Everything goes wrong. Very wrong.  Ultimately, a toaster falls on his head. He goes unconscious. His breakfast aspirations have failed.

OR have they?

When the guy awakens, he finds himself in a hospital bed with a perfectly cooked breakfast.

53. Felt at first the film was mocking the laws of attraction idea. But then in the end, it seems to say if you want something, you'll get it even if your initial attempts fail.

54. Went to Dimitri Ellerington's website.

He's Romanian-English-Australian.

He grew up in London.

His film company is called Sixfoot6 films. Is that Ellerington's height?

I think it's a cute name.

55. Wanted to say that when I was into making my edited home movies, I called my films Flying Monkey films.

Yeah...just wanted to share that.

56. Learned that Ellerington was a production runner on Babe, and that's what inspired him to get into film.

That's sweet.

57. Saw that Ellerington IS (or was) working on a full-length film. It's called The Watched.

The description says it's a thriller that takes place in the Emerald City?

As in Oz...with the wizard?

Or is it Oz as in Australia?

Or does some other place use the name Emerald City?

58. Learned from Lord Wiki that Sydney, Seattle, and some city in the Philippines has the nickname Emerald City.

I'm going to guess that Ellerington's film refers to Sydney.

59. Went to Ellerington's Twitter which is pretty much all links to Instagram. So I'm just going to look at that.

60. Saw that Ellerington went to a Taylor Swift concert.

Is he a fan?

From what he says in his comments, it doesn't seem he looks forward to being swarmed by all the teens.

Does he like Taylor Swift enough to endure the crowd? Or did he go for a favor to someone else?

61. Saw that Ellerington was celebrating David Bowie weeks before Bowie died.

Of course, Bowie has many fans. He's been very famous through the years.

But it does seem like when someone famous dies, a huge number of people suddenly become vocal and demonstrative fans.

Were that many people talking about Robin Williams in the weeks before he died? Michael Jackson? Whitney Houston?

I saw this sweet Tweet around the time that Alan Rickman died. This person Tweeted that she hadn't realized he died. She thought people had just decided to randomly talk about how wonderful he is.  

62. Liked that Ellerington has a photo of himself with a zombie.

Speaking of....

Tonight we're planning to watch the last episode of Fear the Walking Dead. Or really, the last episode of the first season.

63. Saw that Ellerington has a photo of a girl with Rainbow Loom bracelets.

Maybe his daughter?

And maybe that's why he ended up going to a Taylor Swift concert.

He could be a fan, though.

My dad is a huge fan.

64. Saw a photo of the maybe-daughter eating bread with avocado and popcorn.

Interesting!

I think it would probably taste quite good.

How would our world change if we knew for sure there was life after death, and it was easy for our dearly-departed to talk to us via the Internet?   

The Dead are Online  a novel by Dina Roberts 

Behavior Changes, Sneakiness, Justice Lease, and Strong Bladders

1. Started watching an episode of Wicked Science.

2. Surprised by the behavior of the science teacher (Robert van Mackelenberg) in this episode.

He's very nice to Dina (Saskia Burmeister), and acts impatient with Elizabeth (Bridget Neval).

Usually, it's the opposite.

3.  Saw the teacher learn that Elizabeth is the one that's been breaking into the science classroom. This event would give explanation for why he's being less nice to Elizabeth. The problem is, it happened after his attitude changed.

Why did his behavior change before that?

4. Started watching an episode of Home and Away.

5. Had a feeling that Braxton's (Stephen Peacocke) trial is going to end up with the same result as Peter's on Coronation Street.  Despite him being innocent, and his solicitor having a convincing argument for his innocence, the jury will still find him guilty.

6. Saw that the trial wasn't like Coronation Street. They did find convincing evidence for Braxton's innocence, but they also found good evidence for his guilt.

Maybe.

I actually don't know how damning the evidence is, because I wasn't watching the show when the murder happened.

7. Wondered if the viewers are even supposed to be confident of Braxton's innocence.

I kind of assumed he was, but maybe he's not.

With Coronation Street, the viewers were privy to Peter's innocence, and we also knew the identity of the real killer.

8. Went to the Tropfest website.

9. Realized I did not go to the Tropfest website.

I typed in the address, but didn't get there, because my Internet isn't working.

10. Saw that it might just be Tropfest that's not working.

I got to Twitter okay.

11. Found that my Google News is still working.

So, it's just a Tropfest issue.

12. Tried getting to Tropfest by Googling rather than using my bookmark.

That worked.

I guess the problem is my bookmark.

13. Tried the bookmark again.

Now it's working.

That's good.

14. Clicked on the film "Bargain" and saw that it has the actress from Pitch Perfect. What's her name again?

15. Googled.

The actress is Rebel Wilson.

16. Started watching "Bargain".

17.  Finished watching the movie.

I didn't like it much until the ending.

18. Saw that "Bargain" has a lot of views on YouTube—more than I've seen for other Tropfest films.
I assume that's because of Rebel Wilson.

19. Saw from IMDb that Rebel Wilson was already quite successful before she appeared in "Bargain".

She had already starred in three TV shows—Pizza, The Wedge, and Bogan Pride.

20. Saw that Wilson appeared in a drama—an episode of City Homicide.

21. Looked at the actor in "Bargain". His name is Andrew Steel. He kind of looks like an American actor, but I don't know who I'm thinking of.

22. Saw that Andrew Steel was in an episode of Wonderland I've seen.

I can't say I remember him. It's been awhile since I watched that show.

23. Wondered if Chad Lowe is the American actor I'm thinking about.

24. Saw that Andrew Steele did three short films in 2015.

I wonder if any of them are Tropfest films.

25. Saw that Steele was in a TV comedy show called Fresh Blood Pilot Season. I'm guessing the title refers to the American pilot season.

Does Australia have something called a pilot season?

26. Googled and learned Fresh Blood Pilot Season isn't about the American pilot season. It's a competition show with sketch comedy. They're looking for the next Chris Lilly.

27. Saw that Steele played Batman in a TV show called The Justice Lease. It's a parody about superheroes in suburban Melbourne.

It kind of sounds like it would be a web series kind of thing.

28. Saw from this article that I'm right.

It is a web series.

29. Started to watch the first episode.

30. Liked it so far.

31. Finished watching the episode.

I thought it was fantastic. What I liked is that, even though it's a comedy, it has some pretty good dramatic acting.  There was this tense, sad moment, but still...all comedy.

It's hard to explain.

32. Looked at the filmography of Rachel Givney, the director of "Bargain".  She did script-type work for McLeod's Daughters, All Saints, Rescue Special Ops.

33. Saw that Rachel Givney has a website. She calls herself a content creator.

34. Googled content creator.

Lord Wiki says it's creating content. That would include blogs.

So I'm a content creator too.

35. Figured that there are a lot of content creators on the Internet.

36. Learned that Rachel Givney spent fourteen hours in a Singapore airport without using the bathroom.

That's impressive...and kind of scary.

I can barely last three hours.

37. Wondered what's the average time lapse between Rachel Givney's bathroom breaks. I'm guessing fourteen hours was unusual for her. But does she often get close to that record?

38. Wondered why Givney didn't use the bathroom in Singapore. Was she bothered by the lack of cleanliness of the bathrooms? Does Singapore airport have bad bathrooms?

OR maybe she was dehydrated?

39. Found a blog post that says Singapore has great bathrooms.

You know, I remember reading that Singapore has really good airports. I think they actually have little hotel rooms where you can sleep for a few hours.

40. Bewildered by Rachel Givney's toilet deprivation.

41. Wondered if Givney didn't hold in her pee on purpose. Maybe she didn't notice she hadn't peed until she got on the plane.

42. Thought of how Givney used the term bathroom instead of toilet. Maybe in Australia-language, toilet refers to pee and bathroom refers to bowel movements.

If so, fourteen hours is actually not that impressive.

43. Saw that Rachel Givney spends 13.2 hours a day thinking about film.

Well, there you go.

She was probably so deep in film-thought, at the Singapore airport, that she didn't notice her full bladder.

44. Looked at Givney's videos and saw that I've seen one of them before. It's a film called "Mind the Gap".  I think it had a twisty ending like "Bargain".  I mean not a similar twisty ending but it's own unique kind of twist ending. Though now I can't remember what it was.

Kerry Armstrong is one of the stars. I think I watched the film when I wrote my post about her.

45. Decided to re-watch "Mind the Gap", because now I'm curious.

46. Remembered the twist when I started watching.

It was fun watching it a second time, knowing the outcome.

47. Decided that the twist ending in Mind the Gap IS actually similar to the twist in "Bargain"; though one film is a comedy and the other is a drama.

48. Started watching another Justice Lease episode.

The Bruce Banner actor looks familiar to me.

49. Looked up the actor. It's James Shepherd. I don't think I've seen him in anything before.

50. Felt an attraction to James Shepherd—not really in a romantic/crush kind of way.

It's more like he....

I have no idea, really.

He probably reminds me of someone from my past, and I have positive feelings about the person.

It might not be someone I know personally. It could be that he reminds me of an actor that I liked in the past.

51. Looked at him again  and guessed that it probably is an actor that he reminds me of, and not someone I know personally.

52. Could imagine James Shepherd becoming a big star someday.

Certain people just have a look about them.

53. Wanted to say that I don't have any particular talent finding talent. The only time I can think of that I sort of imagined a not-yet-very-famous person becoming famous was when I saw Winona Ryder in Beetlejuice.

That was many many years ago.

2011 Confusion, Crawling Back, Graeme Simsion, and Tim Dean

1. Bewildered by my 2011 brain.

I just read an old post where I talk about this architect that I read about in the Australian Dictionary of Biography.  His father had been married previously, and the architect had several step siblings. For some reason, I couldn't understand why he would have step siblings. I talk about how it would make sense to me for him to have half-siblings but not step siblings.

What?! Why?!

Why was I thinking that?

When reading the biographical information this morning, it made total sense to me. What doesn't make sense to me is that it didn't make sense to me in 2011.

2. Listened to Youth Group's "Daisy Chains" while scrolling through the news headlines on my phones.

The song made the world seem both beautiful and sad.

3. Started watching an episode of Wicked Science.

4. Finished watching the episode.

5. Thought about how Verity's (Emma Leonard) behavior frustrates me. Twice she's pulled away from her dominating friend Elizabeth (Bridget Neval). She stands strong against her. Then she comes crawling back.

I then realized it frustrates me, because it reminds me of myself. There are many times that I vow to take a step back from someone. I do that, but then later I become weak and let them right back in.

For me, it's not about actually cutting someone out of my life.  It's more like pulling away.

Example: Let's say there's someone who often plays one-upmanship when I talk to them.  I might tell them I saw a hawk in our yard—thinking that's pretty cool. They act very unimpressed and tell me they see hawks in their yard all the time, along with eagles, owls, ostriches, penguins, dodo birds, etc.
This happens often.  I'm excited about something. I share something about my life, and they shoot it down.  I decide to stop sharing my happy-special life things with them. It's a good choice. But then one day I have a weak moment and let them in again. Usually, the response they provide makes me regret it.

That's one of my big problems in life—giving people way too many chances.

I make rules that are good for keeping me emotionally safe. But then I break them.

6. Started to watch an episode of Home and Away.

7. Saw that Braxton's (Stephen Peacocke) family isn't pleased with his surprise not-guilty plea.

8. Learned from Twitter that there's a conference going on in Melbourne right now called Above All Human.

It's about being insightful and innovative.

9. Realized the conference is actually NOT going on right now.

It's starting in about thirty minutes...at 8:00.

Right now it's only 7:30 in Melbourne.

The innovative and insightful people of Melbourne are probably rushing to shower and dress so they can be there for the registration and coffee.

10. Saw some of the theme questions of the conference.

What startups should we be building? 
How do we go from zero to hero? 
Can we be successful from Australia?

11. Wondered about very successful entrepreneurs. Did they suddenly have a good idea; then ran with it?  Or did they not have any ideas; then brainstormed until they came up with something?

12. Decided not to download the rest of The Rosie Project.

Now I'm feeling all conflicted about it.

I was put off by the anti-vegan sentiment.

It's not really fair, since I'm vocally anti many things on my blog. Do people stop reading because of that?

They might.

I don't know.

I'm not even vegan. That's the funny thing.  And at times, I've been very amused by some anti-vegan/anti-vegetarian jokes.

Another part of me is tired of it, though.

I'm seen it too many times—the idea that us non-meat eaters are difficult, annoying, picky, abnormal, etc.

13. Glanced at reviews of The Rosie Project on Goodreads. A few people compare the main character to Sheldon Cooper.

I love Sheldon Cooper.

I should read the book.

14. Felt I'm going to be unsettled and conflicted if I don't read the rest of the book.

I think I'll download it.

15. Hoped that I end up loving the book, because otherwise I'm going to regret spending the eleven dollars.

16. Did a horrible thing.

I Googled to get a picture of the author (Graeme Simsion) to see if he looked like an asshole or not.

Yes. I do sometimes judge people on how they look.

I don't want to read a book written by someone who looks like a snob; looks like he's up himself; or looks like he takes himself too seriously.

Graeme Simsion looks like none of those things.

He looks fun.

He looks like someone who has laughing fits.

He looks like someone who laughs so hard he has to wipe tears from his eyes.

17. Decided to check out Simsion on Twitter.

Because I also judge people on their Twitter accounts—even more so than their physical appearance.

18. Saw that Simsion has only six thousand followers.

Why?

He's written a famous, bestselling book.

I'd expect him to be much more popular on Twitter.

19. Felt that Simsion does a bit too much Retweeting. I think that gets annoying.

On the plus side, he doesn't Retweet things only praising himself.

He does that a little bit. But he also Retweets interesting things.

For example, I like this atheist quote he Retweeted.  It's long and part of an image. I'd have to type it out if I wanted to share it here. If you're interested, follow the link. And I'll paraphrase...sort of.

The basic idea is that it's pathetic for religious people to assume humans need the concept of God to prevent them from committing murder.

The Tweet says it much more eloquently than I did.

20. Bought The Rosie Project.

It will take me a long time to read it, since I'm reading six other books at the same time.

21. Went to Tropfest.

Today I'm going to watch a 2009 finalist film called "Fences".

22. Started watching.

23. Saw that the film is about a dad who takes his son to work.

24. Thought that one of the actresses in the film looks familiar.

25. Didn't understand the point of the film, at first. But now I think maybe I get it.

I think it's saying that there are big domestic problems where the police have to get involved; and then there are smaller domestic problems. But they all can be painful for young children.

In the film, a detective gets a call telling him he's needed. The problem is, it's his turn to have his son. He calls his ex, and she refuses to help by taking the boy. The father, in desperation, takes the son on the case with him and leaves him in the car. The son escapes the car and ends up seeing the crime scene.  The mother shows up and gets in a screaming match with the father. Then they both see the tormented look on their child's face and stop their bickering.

26. Felt I was somewhat more on the father's side.

It's not like he was overly eager to go to work. He tried to get out of it.

I don't know why the mother refused to take her son for awhile.

27. Thought that maybe I'm judging too much without knowing the facts (uh...imaginary facts). Maybe the father has often asked the wife to take the son off his hands. Maybe this time he had a legitimate excuse but other times they were flimsy and selfish.

28. Thought maybe the film was also about the whole struggle between job-dedication and parenting-dedication.

29. Saw from IMDb that "Fences" writer is not also the director of the film.

I think this might be the first time I've seen a Tropfest film like that. Usually, the writer and director are one and the same.

30. Saw that the actor from "Fences"—Brett Swain—has been in a lot of things.

He has a very long filmography.

It looks like one of his most substantial role was on SeaChange. He was on twenty-three episodes of that.

31. Looked again and saw that Swain also had a pretty big role on a family TV show called Fergus McPhail. 

He was also on several episodes of Neighbours. He played a character named Kim Timmins.

32. Saw, from The Perfect Blend site, that Kim Timmins married a Rebecchi.

33. Looked at the filmography of Nicole Nabout.

She's the actress in "Fences" that looked familiar to me.

34. Saw that Nabout was one of stars of The Librarians. That's probably what I remember her from.

I would have also seen her on an episode of Offspring and an episode of Upper Middle Bogan.

35. Saw that the actress who played the mother in "Fences", Victoria Eagger, also appeared on The Librarians. 

36. Saw that Chris Corbett, the writer of "Fences" has done a lot of television writing.

He's written episodes of Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries, Neighbours, McLeod's Daughters, Blue Heelers, All Saints, and other things.

37. Went to the Vimeo page of Tim Dean, the director of "Fences".

He has seven videos, including "Fences".

38. Started watching a video called "Wasting Away".

It looks depressing.

Maybe it's about depression.

39. Realized my view of what I'm seeing might be influenced by the title of the film.

40. Saw a woman, in the film, decide not to wear panty hose.

I think she made the right choice.

41. Saw, from the credits, that the woman in the film was played by Alison Bell.

I remember her from I Rock.

42. Wasn't overly impressed with "Wasting Away".

43. Started watching Tim Dean's "Not What I Expected" with hope that I'd like it more than "Wasting Away".

44. Liked the film so far.

First there was this fun, happy music.

Then, all of a sudden, the actress in it started singing.

Maybe it's a musical.

45. Got the idea that it's a musical about Internet love.

46. Thought that the actress in the film is cute.

47. Thought the song was a lot of fun, and I like the singing as well.

48. Finished watching the film.

I'm not sure I fully understand it.

A man and a woman win a contest to meet their Internet love. They're disappointed when they meet, and they never fall in love. Yet they get married and have a child together.

I was wondering why they'd do all that if they didn't love each other. It's not like it's an arranged marriage.

But then I started to think maybe they felt pressure because of the contest they won.

49. Watched another episode of Fear the Walking Dead.

The main family in the story is made up of two American actors, a British actor, an Australian actor, a Maori actor, and a Swedish-American actress.

It's very mixed.

50. Went to an Alycia Debnam Carey fan site.

There's an interview about Fear the Walking Dead.

51. Saw that actually there's a lot of interviews. They're copied them from other sites.

52. Thought I should give credit to the website for at least crediting and linking to the original interviews.

53. Followed the link to the AMC interview.

54. Thought this quote from Debman-Carey, about her character, is insightful. You’ve got everything to look forward to and that’s one of the saddest things about Alicia. She’s got so much to lose because she had so much to gain.

I think there are characters in The Walking Dead universe that have the opposite situation. Debman-Carey mentions this being the case for her on-screen brother. Then there's Daryl on the original series. The zombie apocalypse brought meaning, and a family, into his life.

55. Stopped reading the interview, because I saw it talks about the rest of the season.

We're only finished the second episode.

56. Went to another interview.

Maybe this one won't have spoilers.

57. Relieved to see this interview was published after the second episode.

I think I'm safe.

58. Agreed with Debman-Carey here, about the show. She says, You're just waiting for things to fall apart. It's a constant suspense.

Well, I don't know if I'd go as far as saying there's constant suspense. But there's a lot.

I definitely think this series has more suspense than the original.

The original MIGHT have had suspense in the beginning, but now the zombies seem commonplace, and the survivors are overly adept at fighting them.

59. Liked Debman Carey's honest response when asked how she'd react to a real zombie apocalypse.

She says, It could go one of two ways. I've got good intuition. So it could be something totally unrelated and I'd be like, 'Something is wrong, guys! Something is off! I heard a bump in the night.' So I could go too extreme or I would be the person who is like, 'Everyone is overreacting. Everyone chill out!'

It's really so hard to know what we'd do in these situations.

When I watch these shows, I get so frustrated when the characters make dangerous decisions. For example, Debman Carey's character insists on staying with her infected boyfriend.  It seems so frustratingly foolish to me.  But then, I don't know. Would I do the same if someone I loved had a super high fever  If someone told me to get away from them—that I could get sick too, would I listen?

If it was a casual friend, yes. I'd very likely listen. I'd wish the sick person well and say good-bye.

If I loved them, I probably wouldn't want to leave; that is unless I knew they were bound to turn into a zombie. Then hopefully I'd leave...after shooting them in the head.
 .
But how about in the time period before I know about the zombie thing?

It's easier to know what to do in a horror situation when you're watching it on TV. It's probably much less easy when you're in the midst of it.


Read my novel: The Dead are Online 

Drunk Behavior, Surprise Visits, Books, and Disabilities

1. Dreamed that I have a baby kangaroo. I go to look for it and instead find Eeyore in the bathroom eating something.

That's the second night in a row that I've dreamed of a baby kangaroo.

I'm going to guess it means something.

2. Started watching an episode of Wicked Science.

3. Finished watching the episode.

4. Learned from Twitter that a Sydney rugby player had sex with a dog. Or he pretended to have sex?

Mitchell Pearce also peed on himself, which wouldn't be that bad, but the pee got on someone's couch.

And he was rude.

5. Thought about how the behavior was alcohol-induced and wondered if Mitchell Pearce is also an asshole when he's sober.

Can alcohol turn a nice guy into an asshole, or does it just make bigger assholes out of already-assholes?

6. Had an idea.

At a certain age, young people should be put through a alcohol test. They should get drunk and then specialists can determine if the drunkedness make them funny, endearing, annoying, obnoxious, and/or dangerous.

If they're funny and endearing, they get a license to drink. If they're dangerous or obnoxious, they get their forehead stamped with a warning label.  If they get the dangerous-label, then it will be illegal for any establishment or person to sell or serve them alcohol.

7. Felt fortunate. When the people in my life drink, they become funny, endearing, and at the worst annoying.

No one becomes extremely obnoxious or dangerous—well, at least from what I've witnessed

8. Decided I'm being generous. I rarely find the drunk behavior endearing. Usually, it's annoying.

9. Changed my mind again.

I've encountered people who are more fun and nice then they drink.

Although that's kind of annoying, because then I wonder if it's them being nice to me or the alcohol.

10. Decided the best drinkers are the ones who are nice and fun when sober and maybe get a little more nice and fun when they drink.

11. Sometimes I'm at some kind of social thing and am acting and feeling silly. I'm having a great time. I feel kind of superior to the people around me who had to intake alcohol in order to achieve the same kind of silly mood.

However, there are times where I'm in a blah mood when I wish I could be in a jolly fun mood. I sometimes wonder if alcohol would fix my mood at those times.

Who knows, though. It might fix it to the degree that I'm trying to have sex with one of the family dogs.

12. Started watching an episode of Home and Away.

13. Felt bad for Sasha (Demi Harman). She comes home early from school to surprise Matt (Alec Snow), and Matt doesn't act happy to see her.

I think, though, that it's usually a mistake to try to gift someone with the surprise of your presence.

The recipient of yourself might not be as excited and happy as you wish them to be.

I think the surprise is more likely to be appreciated if A) the recipient hasn't seen you for awhile and wasn't expecting to see you in awhile. B) You're not interfering with the recipient's plans.

If I was expecting to see someone next Tuesday and instead they show up on Sunday, I'm really not going to be thrilled.  If they're interrupting my schedule for Sunday, I'd be annoyed on top of everything else.

If someone I wasn't expecting to see for months, years, (or maybe never) showed up at my door this afternoon, I'd probably be very excited...IF I liked or loved them.

Due to the fact that I'm a bit anal, I'd probably stress a bit about rearranging my day. But I'd still probably be thrilled.

14. Saw that Sasha came back early because she missed Matt.

I think showing up as a surprise because you miss someone is very different than showing up as a surprise because you see yourself as a gift.

I'd feel bad for both types of surprise visitors if they weren't met with joy. However, the former is quite sadder.

15. Thought of times where surprise visits are almost always going to have a positive result.

A) If done to extremely social people. Very social people will probably appreciate any surprise visit from almost any person.

B) In the peak of the honeymoon period of a relationship.  If your girlfriend is in that state where she can hardly eat because her love for you makes her so nervous, she'll probably be overly thrilled if you surprise her at work.  If you try that with your wife of five years, she'll probably think, What the hell are you doing here? What do you want? Could this not wait until the end of the day when we both get home?

16. Felt happy that Braxton (Stephen Peacocke) surprised his family and friends by pleading not guilty rather than agreeing to eight years in prison for a crime he didn't commit.

I think that was a good surprise but probably only because I agree with his decision.

If someone in his family wanted him to plead guilty, it wouldn't be such a good surprise.

It also wouldn't be a good surprise to a family or "friend" who secretly longed for him to be out of the picture for eight years.

17. Decided that Braxton didn't actually mean for it to be a surprise. I don't think he planned the whole thing.

I think it's just he decided at the last minute and didn't have time to give a warning.

18. Saw from IMDb that David Roberts played the judge in the Home and Away scene.

I totally missed that.

I'm going to have to re-watch it.

19. Saw that it really is David Roberts as the judge.

Wow.

It seems kind of strange that a big actor like that would take on such a small role. Although he appears on two further episodes as the judge. Maybe on the other episodes, he has a bigger part.

I guess it could also be like a cameo appearance.

20. Wondered if it's possible that David Roberts just likes to work and takes jobs when he can get them—no matter how big or small.

21. Went to the Tropfest website.

Today I'm going to watch a 2009 finalist film called "Beyond Words".

The synopsis says it's a thriller.

22. Heard noise and then did not hear anything.

Then I saw that the character was deaf.

It's a pretty cool effect.

Last night I had this moment where I started noticing all the sound in my life. It's amazing how almost every little thing we do makes a sound, but most of us rarely notice.

23. Picked up my phone and saw just doing that makes a noise. It was a matter of the phone rubbing up against the pad of paper it was resting on.

24. Picked up a pen.

That actually made no noise, but it did make a noise when I placed it back down on the desk.

25. Heard sound returned to the film.

I wonder if it's going to go back and forth from no sound to sound.

26. Saw that it is indeed going back and forth from sound to no sound.

I wonder what the point of that is.

27. Saw that the movie also has a blind person, and in honor of him, sometimes the film goes dark.

28. Thought this film's point of view seems very random.

I think it would have been better if they made it more consistent—have one half of the film with no sound and then the other with no visual

As it is, it's just goes randomly back and forth. There's sound; then no sound. There's usually visual; then once in awhile there's a brief moment of darkness.

29. Thought that the blind character's voice sounds like Kane from House Husbands. I forgot the actor's name, but he's in another 2009 Tropfest finalist film.

30. Saw from the credits that the actor is Gyton Grantley.

So, in 2009 he starred in two Tropfest films. Well, he was in at least two finalist films that I know of. He might be in even more finalist films, and he might be in non-Finalist Tropfest films.

31. Thought it would be funny if an actor tried to be in as many Tropfest films as possible.

32. Looked at Gyton Grantley's filmography.

According to that, he was in only the two 2009 Tropfest films.

33. Had reading time with Jack.

For my reading, I read part of a sample of The Rosie Project.

So far, it's about Aspergers.

I like it, but I'm not sure if I like it enough to download it.

I'm at the point of auditioning books.

My new thing is to read seven books at a time—not including classics Jack and I are reading together for our English curriculum.

I finished a book earlier this week, so now I'm trying to find a book to replace it.

I had this Israeli book I liked—a true story about a friendship between a famous Israeli and famous Palestinian. But then I saw it was expensive—more than the typical price for e-books. Usually, I try to buy books that are LESS than the usual price.

The other book that's a top contender is, Me Before You—the book that's going to have a movie adaptation featuring Stephen Peacocke.  I liked the sample, so it might become my seventh book.

If I end up liking The Rosie Project a lot, I'll put that second in line. I'm almost done with Ten Days in a Madhouse, so I'll soon need to replace that one with something.

34. Realized that The Rosie Project kind of put me in a bad mood.

It talks about how people see Aspergers as a disorder—a problem.

That attitude really gets to me.

The protagonist of the book believes the same way I do. I guess that's one thing that's making me want to get the book. But then there's a part of me that worries he's going to change his mind.

35. Doubted that's going to be the case.

I should probably not worry about it.

36. Felt that seeing people with Aspergers as being inferior is really no different than seeing people as inferior because they have darker skin or because they are attracted to people of the same gender as themselves.

37. Went to "Beyond Words" on IMDb.

38. Saw that Aramand De Saint-Salvy didn't add anything to his filmography after "Beyond Words".

I'm starting to have doubts that being a Tropfest finalist is a helpful step in the film career ladder.

39. Saw that Charlotte Gregg, the main actress in the film, starred on a TV show called Out of the Blue.

It was on the year before "Beyond Words" was released.

Besides that, it seems she mostly does guest appearances on TV shows.

In 2013, she was on an episode of Wonderland that I've seen. I don't remember who she played, though.

40.. Saw that the attacker (Socratis Otto)  in "Beyond Words" is one of the stars of Wentworth.

I haven't had the pleasure of seeing him yet, because he comes in at season two. I've seen only the first season.

41. Wondered if Socratis Otto is related to Miranda Otto, and that other Otto.

Who's the other Otto?

It's a filmmaker....

I totally forgot.

42. Remembered. It's not a filmmaker. It's an actor.

Barry Otto.

Although maybe he's made films too.

43. Saw that Socratis Otto was also in iFrankenstein.

Miranda Otto was in that too.

44. Looked at Socratis Otto's IMDb biography. It doesn't mention a relation to the other Otto's.

45. Learned from this article title, that Otto plays a transgender person on Wentworth.

46. Started to read the article; then stopped. I'm afraid it's going to have way too many spoilers.

47. Saw that Armand de Saint-Salvy has a website.

It looks like he does commercials.

So, even though Tropfest didn't boost de Saint-Salvy into a big film career; it may have helped his advertising career.

48. Learned that de Saint-Salvy does TV promos—it seems mostly for reality television.

49. Saw that de Saint-Salvy was a finalist in the Superbowl Doritos commercial contest.

I remember hearing about that.

I don't think I ever watched any of the commercials.

50. Watched de Saint-Salvy's promo for a show called Haunting.  Like "Beyond Words", it involves a scared woman.

51. Watched Saint-Salvy's video about the Deaf Society hip-hop.

I wonder if he has a personal interest in deafness.

The video had the same message as the one I like to see about Aspergers and Autism. It speaks out against the idea of deafness being a disability.

52. Felt that there IS a such thing as a disability.

I think we go too far if we try to totally eliminate the word from our vocabulary.

My feeling is that if a condition causes people to lack something, but they're stronger than average in another skill or attribute; then it's a difference or syndrome; not a disability.

53. Thought that someone could argue that missing something has made them stronger because they've had to work harder.  That might be the case, but I'd describe it as their disability making them stronger. I wouldn't see it as not-having-a-disability.

54. Decided that people with deafness, Aspergers, schizophrenia, blindness, dwarfism, missing limbs, dyslexia, diabetes, etc. can decide for themselves if they want to see their trait/traits as a disability or not.

The problem, though, is everyone has a different opinion. You can might meet one deaf person who talks about her disability. Then you mention deafness as a disability to another person, and they become horribly offended.

55. Realized maybe I'm being unfair to people who see autism/Aspergers as a disorder.

It's all a matter of perspective.

I see someone like Sheldon Cooper and think yeah, he's annoying, but he's also awesome. Someone else might see him and think it's sad that he has such a crippling mental disorder.

56. Thought that while I see having diabetes and Cystic Fibrosis as a disability, other people might think it's just a difference.

I'm trying to imagine someone saying. Yes, my mucus is a bit thick, and I can hardly breathe sometimes. But CF is a difference not a disability.

57. Thought of how some people have given me the idea that they see me as being disabled. For example, there was someone who saw my obsession with Australia as being part of a mental problem.

58. Wanted to say that in my PERSONAL opinion, mild Autism/Aspergers is not a disability.

I do feel that things like cancer, epilepsy, diabetes, quadriplegia, etc. are disabilities.

59. Wondered if there ARE people out there who believe their diabetes, epilepsy, CF, etc. is not a disability.

60. Googled things like Cystic Fibrosis is not a disability and diabetes is not a disability.

I didn't easily find anyone making that argument.

61. Wondered if I just imagined there are people who are against the word disability.

62. Looked up the definition of disability.

I got:

a condition (such as an illness or an injury) that damages or limits a person's physical or mental abilities 

the condition of being unable to do things in the normal way : the condition of being disabled

With the second definition, you can fit in a ton of things—pretty much anyone that doesn't fit into the majority.  

Although I guess the key word is unable. There's a difference between being unable to do what the majority does, and having an inclination that makes you less likely to do or want what the majority does.  

63. Started reading a website about disabilities—what's accepted terminology, and what is not.

It seems for the most part, the word disability is okay.

The site says this about autism, blindness, and deafness. Some people who are autistic, blind, deaf, and a few other disabilities embrace their disability as a minority identity. 

They seem to have a different viewpoint than the deaf hip-hop video, though. Further down, they say,  They are not dismissing the fact that they are disabled - but they are dismissing it as a negative experience. I am autistic. I am an aspie. I am deaf. I am blind. I am disabled.

I think some people DO disagree about the disability label.

64. Thought about how I've also seen the mad pride movement—people who don't see their schizophrenia, or other mental...uh difference? as a disability.

It might seem outlandish to some but then we should remember that at one time homosexuality was seen as a mental illness.

65. Thought again that it's all a matter of opinion.

I can look at someone and see them as disabled, but they don't see themselves that way.

I can look at someone and think that they're not disabled, and they might disagree with me.

66. Thought again about the person who thought it was a problem that I get obsessed with things.

She herself had been obsessed with things and saw it as a problem. To her it was a disability. To me, it's not.

67. Thought about how I saw myself as having an eating disorder, but my parents thought I was just dieting and were very impressed with my willpower, intense exercise regime, and weight loss.

68. Thought of how I had a conflict with some people online because they saw themselves as being mentally ill, and I saw them as being quirky.

69. Thought about how it's hard to agree with other people about how to label ourselves and each other.

70. Thought about how topics like this really confuse me.

It's kind of stressing me out.

71. Decided that I very much like being able to hear, so in my opinion, deafness is a disability. But if I was born deaf, there's a very good chance I'd feel differently.

72. Watched the first episode of Fear the Walking Dead, which features the young Aussie actress Alycia Debman-Carey.

When watching her scenes, I saw Debman-Carey as an Aussie girl who struck gold during pilot's week rather than an American teen dealing with the beginning of the zombie apocalypse.

I don't think this is because Debman-Carey did a bad job getting into character.

I think it's because I saw her in that acting documentary, so I'm used to Debman-Carey playing (being) herself.

Sometimes a role (even if it's real) sticks with me, and it's hard for me to get used to the actor as another character.

But I bet within a few episodes, I'll see Debman-Carey as her character rather than Debman-Carey the actress.

73. Realized there's a second non-white actor on Home and Away—Pia Miller, born in Chile.  She plays the police officer.

Here I thought it had an all white cast, but it's more like my brain forgot or missed the non-white people.

So Home and Away has a lot of white people, but they also have a Latina actress and a Maori actor.

74. Thought about how Fear the Walking Dead has a very racially mixed cast. But if it's anything like it's parent-show, the black actors aren't going to keep their job for very long.

Read my novel: The Dead are Online 

January 18-20, Mean Good People, Character Names, and Food that's Not Beautiful

1. Dreamed about Australia Day.

I start to question the concept of Invasion Day. I remember that the white Australians didn't actually arrive on January 26. I remember that they arrived a few days before this.

I wake up. I want to write down my dream and do research.  I'm also not sure, though, if I want to write a blog post, because we are with a lot of family over the weekend.  I want to have time with them.  I consider taking a blogging break for one of the days (Saturday or Sunday). I decide I might as well blog today, since I want to talk about my Australia dream.

I leave the bedroom at 6:45, so I don't bother Tim and Jack while writing. To my surprise, most people seem to already be up. I struggle to find a quiet place to write.

At some point, I decide Australians should change either the date of Australia Day or the national anthem. My idea is that Australians should votes on which to change. I start to write about how people who want to keep both, and people who want to change both, will have to compromise.

2. Forced myself to write my dream down on my phone in the middle of the night, though I was feeling tired and lazy.

I did that; then went back to sleep and had more dreams. Two of them were Australia related.

In one, I see a Time Magazine that has Bo and Hope, from Days of our Lives, on the cover. I see the picture was taken at Darling Harbour. For some reason, it makes me a bit sad. Jealous maybe.

In the other dream, Jack and I are at at animal park. We see a kangaroo that's about the size of a hummingbird. Jack gets it to jump up into his arms. I complain about this. I tell him that the kangaroo could jump or fall. It would be too high for something so small.

Jack goes to talk to people who work at the animal park about the kangaroo. Then he reports back to me. The kangaroo doesn't have a mother. There's no way to feed it, and it's destined to die. I'm wondering if there's something we can do to help the kangaroo, but I'm feeling a bit hopeless and helpless.  

3. Consulted Lord Wiki about the First Fleet.

He says the ships arrived between January 18-20.

Why not have an Invasion Day on one of those dates?  That can be the day that people complain, mourn, feel guilty, etc.  Then a few days later, Australians can celebrate the positive aspects of Australia.  I mean it's kind of a miracle that a penal colony managed to transform itself into such a spectacular country.

4. Started to watch an episode of Wicked Science.

5. Continued to think the so-called good guys of Wicked Science are actually quite cruel.

I think sometimes people, in both real life and fiction, are divided into good guys and bad guys. The good guys can be as cruel as they want  and still maintain their label of good.

Dina (Saskia Burmeister) is downright mean in this episode. She rejects Russell's (Benjamin Schmideg) flirtations in a very cold-hearted way. She threatens to end her friendship with Toby (Andre de Vanny) when he makes a mistake. And she says to Elizabeth (Bridget Neval), People would rather have food poisoning than have anything to do with you. 

Now, Dina's insult is in response to Elizabeth's insults to her.  It wasn't unprovoked. I'm just saying that the so-called good guys in this story can be just as mean as the so-called villain.

The kids at the school are so mean to Elizabeth. It makes me wonder. Are they mean to her because she's been awful through the years? Or has she turned into a wicked bitch in response to being ostracized for many years?

6. Started watching an episode of Home and Away.

7. Didn't understand Spencer's (Andrew J. Morley) way of thinking.

He talks to Maddie (Kassandra Clementi) who tells him she's tired of people wanting to talk only about cancer with her. She talks about needing a friend who isn't so cancer-focused. Spencer talks about being this friend for her. Then he decides to be nice to Maddie by organizing a school fundraiser for cancer.

Yes, it's nice he wants to raise money for cancer. But maybe he can do that later. At this point, I think his focus should be on making life fun for Maddie and not focusing on cancer.

8. Wondered how Maddie is going to react to the fundraiser plan. Will she appreciate it, or not?

9. Wondered about a book sample I'm reading—Silence by Natasha Preston.

The main male character is named Cole, which makes me think of Cole on Charmed, played by Julian McMahon. Then the second most frequent name in the book I've seen is Julian.

Is the author a fan of Julian McMahon, or am I reading too much into things?

On top of the Julian and Cole, though, there is a Ben. Julian McMahon played Ben on Home and Away.

10. Saw that Home and Away was NOT Julian McMahon's first screen appearance.

Yikes. I'm feeling like I'm having one of those Mandela Effect things.

Have you heard of that?  Jack told me about it recently. It's where you find out you've been wrong about something and then find other people who have the same falsehood as you. The idea behind it is that these wrong things come from parallel universes.

One of the big examples is hearing someone died and thinking, wait, I thought they died years ago!

The other one involves that certain children's book series with a brother and sister bear learning to eat less junk food, clean their room, etc. How do YOU spell their last name?

But, anyway. Yeah. In my parallel universe, Julian McMahon started his acting career on Home and Away. Apparently, I'm a in a new universe now, and Julian McMahon started his career with The Power, the Passion.

11. Wondered if Vincent Price is alive or dead in this universe.

12. Back to the Julian book.

It could be a coincidence.  It probably is.

Once, though, I wrote this time traveling screenplay and used first names of actors I liked at the time.

There was a Gillian for Gillian Anderson; Scott for Scott Wolf; Holly for Holly Marie Combs.  I might have had an Alyssa too.

Who else?

I think I had the guy from Now and Again. What's his name?

13. Remembered the name—Eric Close.

14. Couldn't remember the others.

15. Looked at the screenplay. There's also a Richard, Christopher, and Samuel.

I don't know what actors inspired those names.

Maybe Christopher Walken?

16. Wondered if Samuel was for Samuel Jackson.

17. Saw from IMDb that The Power, the Passion had zero episodes.

That's strange.

I don't know what to make of that.

18. Went to the Tropfest website.

Tonight I'm going to watch a 2009 film called "Left Unspoken".

19. Started watching the film.

20. Saw that the film involves friends who've begun dating.

21. Saw the characters confessing secrets to each other.

The man irons his underwear and cries when he watches Titanic.

The woman drinks milk from the carton and likes Brittany Spears.

I think it's cute.

22. Thought the audio in the film was a bit poor.

There's a lot of background noise—like the stuff you hear in home videos.

23. Wondered if the noises are there on purpose. Maybe it's supposed to make it feel more real?

Or was the filmmaker unable to find a good sound technician?

24. Thought the film had a powerful ending.

It reminds me of bad dreams I've had.

25. Watched the credits and saw that the song playing towards the end was a Kate Miller-Heidke song.

26. Looked at the filmography of Avi Lewin, the writer and director. "Left Unspoken" is his only listed credit.

27. Saw that the film DID have a sound department.

28. Saw that Elan Zavelsky, the actor in the film, appeared in three episodes of season two of Underbelly.  I can't say I remember him, but he did look slightly familiar to me when I watched "Left Unspoken"

29. Saw that Zavelsky was also in a TV show called Spirited.

I think I've seen this on filmographies, but don't remember ever looking closely at it.

Claudia Karvan was the star.

It was a fantasy thing.

I wrote a post once about how Australia doesn't seem to have a lot of science fiction/fantasy that's not geared towards kids and teens. So, here's an exception. That's very cool.

I hope I can watch it one day.

30. Saw that Claudia Karvan was one of the creators of the show.  

31. Went to Avi Lewin's Twitter. He lists his job as being an information security and audit professional. I'm not sure what that is. Something technological, I think.

He also says he's an aspiring screenwriter and director.

32. Saw that Avi Lewin was disappointed that the Steve Jobs movie wasn't being released until January in Australia.

I wonder if it's out by now, and if Lewin has seen it.

33. Checked IMDb.

They're saying the movie's not being released in Australia until February 4.

It's already been released almost everywhere else.

Why is Australia getting it almost last? The only one behind them is Japan.

34. Saw that Avi Lewin got an Apple Watch.

I know someone who got one. She was very excited about it. Then recently, she told me she no longer like its.

35. Liked this Tweet from Lewin. Given the choice of painting any plaster item in the shop, my 3 year old went straight for Darth Vader. I just won parenting. Job done.

That's very cute.

At Disney World, there is a promotional video that talks about how Star Wars is something shared between parents and children.

It's amazing how some pop cultural things are so intergenerational.

Star Wars, Doctor Who, Batman, Superman....

36. Couldn't think of anymore examples.

I suppose I could keep listing superheroes.

37. Liked Lewin's The Walking Dead Tweet.

38. Felt that Lewin is obsessed with the Apple Watch.

He has a LOT of Tweets about it.

39. Googled Sarah Becker, the actress in "Left Unspoken", and ended up on the Australian Theatre For Young People website.

40. Learned that Sarah Becker's advice to young people is, My advice to young people who want to take on the theatre world? Don’t be afraid to have a point of view. Know what it is you stand for and this will give you courage!

Do I know what I stand for?

I'm not sure.

41. Didn't understand how having a point of view would give someone courage.

Are strongly opinionated people more brave than wishy-washy ones?

42. Saw that Becker ended up working with the Australian Youth Orchestra.

I wonder if she plays an instrument.

43. Went to Elan Zavelsky's Instagram.

There's a plate of food that looks really gross to me.

The piece of meat looks like a flattened penis, and then there' something else that looks like leaking brains.

44. Read the caption and learned it's Swedish food.

If anyone Swedish reading this is offended, they can get back at me by commenting on gefilte fish.

45. Didn't think this plate of food looked good either.

I don't think I have the same food likes as Elan Zavelsky.

46. Disliked this food picture.

47. Did like the broccoli in this picture.

I'm trying to be positive here.

48. Liked the quote on this post.  Gardening is cheaper than therapy, and you get tomatoes.

49. Thought about how the quote isn't always true.

What if you don't grow tomatoes?

If you don't grow tomatoes and you get tomatoes, you might become obsessed with the mystery of why the tomatoes are growing. It might drive you insane, and then you might end up needing therapy, after all.

50. Saw more and more food that looks very unappetizing to me.

Mean Protagonists, Bossy People, Rejection, and Snow

1. Read an article about how the homeschooling rate is increasing in South Australia.

There aren't a lot of families doing it—only 651.  But in 2006, there were only 374.  

I think it's going to become more and more common.

2. Imagined that one day, schooled children might be the minority.

3. Read Tweets with the hashtag #YouknowyourAustralianwhen.  

I think it's basically a forum for Australians to describe their various life experiences.

My favorites so far:

Camille's Tweet,  #youknowyoureaustralian when you think you see a snake so you pick up a stick to hit it but it's the stick that's the snake

Ella's Tweet, #youknowyoureaustralianwhen u come out of the toilet w an interesting fact annd have to explain to your family that it came from ur pad wrapper

4. Started watching an episode of Wicked Science.

I's about not being invited to a birthday party.

5. Thought about the episode.

What happens is, Bianca (Anya Trybala) doesn't invite Elizabeth (Bridget Neval) to her birthday party, so Bianca uses her magical science skills to ruin the birthday party by creating bad weather.

Maybe Bianca and her friends would have saved themselves some trouble if they hadn't excluded Elizabeth. Have they not heard the story of Sleeping Beauty?

6. Thought it was quite mean to invite everyone or almost everyone in the class, except one person—even if that one person is a brat.

7. Decided the show reminds me a bit of The Saddle Club in that the "good guys" are not much better than the villain.

8. Remembered something else in the episode.

Elizabeth plans to create a cyclone at the beach, which is very dangerous. This is supposed to be seen as a villainous act.

But then Toby (Andre de Vanny) stops Elizabeth's plan by relocating the cyclone to where Elizabeth is. Wouldn't that be dangerous as well?

If Toby was really that much better than Elizabeth, he would have just stopped the cyclone.

Or maybe he didn't know how.

9. Wondered if maybe I didn't watch close enough. Maybe Toby made sure that the cyclone was gentle.

10. Started watching the scene again and saw that Elizabeth and her minions started a twister not a cyclone.

11. Saw that Toby used a mylar balloon reflection to bring the twister to Elizabeth. I'm guessing this is the only idea he could come up with.

But still. He hears Elizabeth and her friends screaming in terror. He doesn't look at all concerned. In fact, he smiles about it.

What would our world be like if we

 knew for sure there 

was life after death, and 

we could easily talk to our 

dearly-departed on the Internet?

The Dead are Online a novel by Dina Roberts 

12. Started watching an episode of Home and Away.

13. Learned that Andy (Tai Hara) isn't opposed to having sex with Hannah (Cassie Howarth). He just didn't expect the opportunity to come so soon. Or so he says.

I think the idea of having sex with a paralyzed person might not appeal to him, so he wants to procrastinate.

14. Thought maybe Andy just needs time to get used to the idea.

I don't think Andy is a bad guy, and I don't think he's never going to want to have sex with Hannah again unless she regains movement of her legs.

He might just need to get used to the changes.

On the other hand, he should probably push himself a bit. It's hard enough for Hannah to deal with not being able to walk again. It would be better if she didn't have to have doubts about her boyfriends attraction to her.

15. Didn't like what John (Shane Withington) says about his son Jett (William Charles McDonald) not wanting to move.

When Jett slams the door in anger, John says Jett has to learn he can't always get his own way. Yet John's wife and son don't want to move. Isn't John really the one that's insisting he get his own way?

I think there are people who are very controlling and self-centered. They want things their way and like to make the decisions. Sometimes they may try to sound open-minded. They'll say they're willing to listen to the ideas of others. But then those ideas are often quickly shut down.  When these people hear plans that are in opposite to their own, especially if not solicited, they get agitated. Then they sometimes label the disagreeing individuals as selfish and difficult.

16. Started to worry I was actually describing myself.

17. Thought about it.

I can be a bit bossy sometimes—especially with traveling plans.  On the other hand, I often feel I'm trying to balance what Tim wants with what Jack wants. Then there's also what I want.

18. Decided I'm not so awful usually. Jack talked about wanting to go to Disneyland next instead of Disney World. I let it be known that I prefer Disney World and got him on my side.  I didn't lay down the law, though. I just pleaded my case and won. Then later Jack went back to wanting to go to Disneyland, and he soon had ME convinced.

19. Thought about how I'm usually the one who makes the plans, but I definitely put other people's interests into consideration and am usually flexible about changing plans.

20. Thought about how sometimes I am bossy but say the other person can have their way IF they follow my rules.

For example, I recently told Tim I'd be willing to move to a new house IF we get rid of every single cardboard box lying around our house, and all the junk. Our house is SO full of crap. I'm not having movers come to pack up all our crap so we can unpack the crap in a new house.

21. Thought Andy was being a jerk.

First of all, he tells Hannah that it's his job to take care of her. Of course, she gets even more upset at this. He's pretty much saying she's a burden.

Then Hannah releases Andy from his duty. She says he doesn't have to stay with her anymore. He doesn't fight back!  He just walks out.

Is he relieved? Is he clueless?

If someone did that to me, I would assume they didn't want to be with me.

It's not like Hannah pretended she was one over the relationship.  You know how fictional characters do that sometimes—they pretend to be disinterested in someone they love, because they think they're protecting them?

 I know! Like Edward to Bella in Twilight.

What would it say about Bella if Edward rejected her by saying he understands he's a burden to her; she's free to go; and Bella just walked away?  I think I'd conclude that Bella really wasn't that attracted to Edward and welcomed the chance to gain her freedom back.

22. Hoped Hannah will find a new man that will treat her right.

23. Thought of a situation in which I wouldn't fault Andy.

That is if he had stopped loving Hannah before the accident.

What if he had wanted to break up with her before the accident but hadn't gotten around to it?

He'd be kind of stuck now, because people would think the worst of him if he dumped Hannah while she was struggling with her injuries.

If I remember correctly, there was a storyline like that in the movie 50/50. The girlfriend wanted out of the relationship, and then the boyfriend got cancer.  She was presented as a bitch for not doing enough to support him. But I think if she had loved him, she would have done more.

It's a really difficult situation.

Is it Andy and Hannah's situation? I don't know. Because the Hulu episodes begin after the bus crash. I don't know what was going on with Andy and Hannah before that.

24. Went to the Tropfest website.

Today I'm going to watch a 2009 film called "Blue".

25. Started to watch the film.

26. Saw lots of snow in the film.

27. Saw a minute and a half pass by without any dialogue.

I think this film isn't going to have a lot of talking.

28. Saw that a large portion of the film is a woman walking in the snow.

29. Did not like the sound of the woman digging in the snow with her hands.

It bothers me for some reason.

30. Finished watching the movie.

I thought it was okay. I didn't hate it, but I also didn't love it.

31. Thought about the TSI rule. Each 2009 Tropfest film is supposed to involve the word spring.

I didn't see any spring.

I saw a lot of winter.

32. Wondered if "Blue" was one of the Tropfest films not made by Australians.

There's a lot of snow in the movie, and I don't associate that amount of snow with Australia.

Then I thought of places like Hotham, Victoria and the Snowy Mountains.  I know those places have snow. Do they have a lot of it?

33. Googled and saw photos of Hotham.

There's a lot of snow.

34. Saw from IMDb that the film was not filmed in Australia.

It was filmed in Germany.

All but one cast member has the name Müller. That sounds German.

The other cast member is Nathan Stone. He's also the writer and director. His name sounds less German to me.

Is he German? Australian? Other?

35. Saw that Nathan Stone usually does visual effects work.  He was digital compositor for a movie I saw a week or so ago—Wyrmwood: Road of the Dead.

36. Googled digital compositor, because I don't know what that is.

Lord Wiki says it involves combining layers in a film.

37. Read another website about digital compositing. I think I sort of get it but not enough to explain it.

What I'm thinking is it's like when I used to edit films. On the program, there are multiple layers for visual and audio. So one layer might have your footage; then another layer might have some sort of overlay—for example, titles or other video

38. Remembered in one of my home videos, I actually got fancy and had over-lay flashbacks using past videos.

39. Looked through Nathan Stone's credits. He's done work in Asia, Germany, and Australia—maybe other places as well.

40. Googled and learned that Nathan Stone, along with a guy named Stuart Campbell, have a visual effects company called Double Barrel VFX.

It's located in Perth.

The two guys work with film, television, video games, and probably other things.

41. Started to watch the Double Barrel VFX reel.  It starts off grim—people injured in a car accident.
Now I'm seeing fire and a plane crash.

This isn't a happy video.

42. Thought the film was neat, because it shows the original footage. Then a line goes by, and we're shown the doctored result.

43. Saw from Twitter that Tony Abbott is meeting with a controversial religious group in the US.  It seems they're anti-gay.

44. Started to read an article about the situation.

45. Learned that Alan Sears, the founding president of Alliance Defending Freedom wrote a book entitled, The Homosexual Agenda: Exposing the Principal Threat to Religious Liberty Today.

It reminds me of someone we have in our lives. We were talking about Modern Family, and he complained about the homosexual agenda.  Or maybe he called it the liberal agenda. I forget.

46. Wanted to say that one of the things I like about Crash Course is John Green talks about how freedom is defined in different ways. For some, it's freedom from big government. For others, it's freedom from poverty and starvation.

For some people, freedom is being able to marry the person you love.

For others, freedom is being free from having neighbours who are in a same-sex marriage.

Saw from Twitter that Triple J now has their 2015 countdown!

I guess it's an Australia Day thing.

47. Saw from the Triple J website that the countdown is actually not finished, because it's in progress.

It will be going on through out the day.

Right now, they have songs 100-95 up.

48. Started looking at the nationalities of 95-100.

49. Saw that song 94 is there now.

50. Counted.

Out of the six bottom songs, three are Australian, two are British, one is American, and one is British and American.

51. Tried to decide if I want to go through the list like I did with the 2014 one.

I think maybe I will, but after I finish with all the Tropfest films.

52. Decided to listen to the live countdown for a little bit. That's kind of exciting.

Right now there's an Indian-sounding song.

53. Saw that it's called "Indian Summer" by Jai Wolf.

I wonder if Jai Wolf is Indian.

54. Learned that Jai Wolf is from New York.

He looks sort of Indian, but I'm not sure.

55. Saw that the next song ("Golden Features") features Thelma Plum. I think I remember her...a little.

The music group is Golden Features.

56. Read about Golden Features.

The identity of Golden Features was a secret. Then it was revealed that it was a longtime Sydney producer. Apparently, there's a trend with that—people making music and being mysterious about their identity.

It's like The Bad Lip Reading video guy. I really want to know who that is!