They were nice enough to let me dig into their old file cabinets. I found some old report cards and my physical/occupational therapy reports from John Muir Elementary School in Madison Wisconsin.
I took them home with me and read them.
Now I've decided to type them up here.
One of the reasons: During our house disaster and decluttering, there was a point where I thought I had lost my big envelope of my medical records which includes all my neurology stuff—the MRI report, the MRI DVD, the EEG reports, the few seconds of EEG snapshots, etc.
I was upset about this but what helped me be less upset is I knew I had copied the info onto my blog. And I actually referred to my blog when filling out some of my autism-diagnosis info.
Another Reason: I think one of my special interests is actually myself...my past-self. I saw an autism meme the other day on Instagram that said something about autistic people not-being-self-centered. We're interest-centered.
BUT......what if your interest is you?
Well, I think some of us are VERY self-reflective. I think being self-reflective is fine, really. I think that's different than being selfish.
Shit.
I was about to say it's not selfish to be self-reflective. It's selfish to expect other people to be interested in you. And then I remembered I'm writing all this on a blog...and I plan to type out all my therapy info.
Uh.....
Maybe it's okay to HOPE that SOME people out there are interested. And that's different than expecting everyone to be interested.
Most people will probably be bored and disinterested in what I copy below. But maybe other people going through an autism diagnosis or dyspraxia diagnosis...or whatever diagnosis might find it interesting. Or...maybe parents of children diagnosed or not yet diagnosed? Maybe therapists who are really into their field?
Anyway....I'll shut up and get with the records.
Like with my diary posts, I'm going to use green font for the ancient stuff, and my comments will be in regular-black font.
Adina was referred for Occupational/Physical Therapy evaluation by the classroom teacher Barb Grooms on 10/23/78, because the parents stated that a physician in St. Louis had recommended therapy in the past. These records were not available to us, but the results of our evaluation show the following:
THE parents? That kind of sounds...rude?
I've been very bad at keeping up with my medical records. I've changed doctors many times and have usually not had the records forwarded. It seems maybe I inherited this habit from my parents. Or... THE parents (AKA Laurie Robertd and Leonard Roberts)
I'm Googling my old kindergarten teacher....not having much luck. I assume she is no longer of the living, though. I think she was quite elderly back in 1970. Though...sometimes those who seemed elderly when we were young were actually only in their forties or fifties. My mom and dad would have been around 30/29 in 1978, so someone in their forties might have seemed quite old to me.
Fine Motor Perceptual Motor:
Adina was given the Beery Buktenica Test of Visual Motor Integration and scored 4-9 age equivalents. She was also given the Frostig Test of Visual Perception and her scores varied from 4-9 age equivalents to 7-0 age equivalents. The low scores were in areas that had a very high motor component.
Test scores:
Eye-Hand Coordination: 4-9 age equivalent
Figure Ground 4-9 age equivalent
Form Constancy 7-0 Age equivalent
Position in Space 5 age equivalent
Spatial Relations 5-6 age equivalent
Back when I first found these records, and again today, I tried to figure out what those scores meant. I had no luck.
Her fine motor skills were somewhat delayed. She has "total pattern" type grasp when printing, has a weak grip, and motions are shoulder directed rather than using the fine movements of her hand.
Ah! This is an issue for me when I play Mario Kart. I start using my whole body and do really awful. I have to force myself to not do that...and then I play okay.
Her right hand is more coordinated than her left and her fine motor coordination decreased with bilateral activity. She also switches hands during activities like cutting. When resistance is added to any fine motor activity, she has a mild tremor which appears to be due to weakness.
The tremor really got my attention. I have a tremor and wasn't sure when it began. I remember it bothering me in college but didn't know if I had it before.
So...maybe I had it all the way back in early childhood.
Two doctors in my adult life have labeled it an essential tremor. It could be the early childhood one was due to weakness and what I have now is totally separate. Or it could be that the tremor back then was the same tremor I have now, and they mistook it for weakness. I mean not that I doubt the weakness-part. But maybe the tremor wasn't caused by the weakness.
She performs most fine motor activity very slowly and needed reassurance that she is doing a good job.
As I still have the tremor, I also still have the need for reassurance.
Her preschool kindergarten skills are adequate but somewhat delayed for a 6-year-old. She is able to dress herself and tie but does not have the strength in her hands to tie a bow on her shoe that holds. Her self portrait is somewhat immature. On the Early Childhood Fine Motor Checklist, she scored within the 5 year range on most activities.
I'm guessing with that, the 5 year literally means 5 years.
Gross Motor: Adina is able to complete most 5-6 year level gross motor skills on the Gross Motor Checklist. She has some difficulty with skills that require quick movements, balance, and motor planning. She does not throw or catch a ball smoothly or to turn a summersault but she is able to do good sit-ups, push-ups, wheelbarrows, squat to stand, jumping, and hopping. There was a minimal amount of scapular winging with some of these activities. Adina seems to lack confidence in her abilities and needed reassurance. This may have also affected the quality of her performance.
Range of motion, muscle strength, balance reactions and gait are good. One exception to this is a mild amount of shoulder girdle weakness (which causes the winging of the scapula) On one exception, there was evidence of an Asymmetrical Tonic Neck reflex present. Adina has mildly hypotonic muscle tone.
Six-year-old Adina had a weak shoulder. 48-year-old Dina has a very painful shoulder. I injured it in July in a public bathroom. And now I think it's evolved into the frozen shoulder thing. It's hard for me to do simple things like put on a bra, shave under my arms, cut my hair, etc.
This neurology company says that an ATN neck reflex past infancy is connected to dyslexia.
I wouldn't be surprised if I'm dyslexic too.
From what I see of descriptions, tests, etc....a lot of these diagnoses can overlap. It seems like what is sometimes shown as being part of autism is other times labeled as a comorbidity of autism.
It's confusing and hard to explain.
I guess it's like one professional might label me as having autism, dyslexia, dyspraxia, etc. Then another might feel that only one of those labels is needed.
I just Googled Asymmetrical Tonic Neck Reflex and Autism; found this website It talks about sample Asperger kiddos with a delay in getting rid of their reflex; then concludes: This leads us to believe that one abnormality that can be seen in infancy in autism and in the Asperger’s syndrome is excessively long persistence of some reflexes that should have been inhibited earlier in the child’s development.
Continuing with the therapy-report....
Although Adina shows some delay we feel that these problems are not severe because she has learned to accommodate for some of the deficits.
I feel that self-accommodation has been a running theme through-out my life. For example, instead of going to the doctor for my shoulder, I am figuring out alternate ways of putting on a bra.
We do feel, however, that the delays are significant enough to work on during the remainder of her kindergarten program. It has been our experience that children who show these minimal delays and do not have the opportunity to play "catch up" in kindergarten class often experience difficulty with the academic/motor skills required in first grade. We therefore recommend that Adina be seen on a regular basis in therapy for the rest of the school year. Adina appears to lack self-confidence and needs frequent reassurance. She often says "I'm bad", "I can't" or Did I do it right?"
Yeah. That makes me kind of sad. For me.
Forty-two years later, the self-esteem issues haven't gotten much better.
I shall continue with the reports in later posts.....
Read my novel: The Dead are Online
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