I think like as with politics, the world of autism as a left-wing and a right-wing.
The extreme right-wing view: Autism is a tragic disease. We need to find a cure as fast as possible.
The extreme left-wing view: We need to accept autistic people which means treating them with an absolutely perfect mix of sympathy, understanding, and celebration.
The right-wing pushes a message of, you need to become a different person but don't worry we will help you change.
The left-wing pushes a message of, you don't need to change and in fact you should embrace your difficult behaviors, because it will reduce your imposter syndrome and help convince those around you that your diagnosis is valid.
Like I have become with politics...I am pushing myself to go for a center approach.
I am autistic.
That's very cool.
I adore autistic-Dina.
I am super awesome...in some ways. And a lot of my awesomeness comes from being born autistic.
But some aspects of my autism are shitty for me and/or shitty for others.
I don't need to bend completely to make things super lovely for others. Yet I shouldn't expect them to bend completely for me.
We can all bend a little.
Give a bit. Take a bit.
This also means I don't need to be fully accepting of hurtful and/or annoying behaviors in others...whether they are autistic, or under the overly-wide neurodivergent umbrella, or are a so-called neurotypical.
For example. No, I don't want to listen to someone info-dumping about a subject I care little about. UNLESS...they're willing to show interest in my interests.
Yes, I recognize that some people have more control over this than others. I will have more sympathy and will attempt to have more patience with people who I see as not having the ability to easily improve their conversational skills.
But if the info-dumping person (autistic or not) appears to have the ability to learn new skills when they put effort into it, I will be less tolerant...and probably avoid being stuck in a conversation with them.
I'm not going to let anyone bore me to tears in the spirit of autism-acceptance.
