Friday, August 28, 2015

Confrontation, Off-Limit Topics, Taking Sides, and Vague Memories of TV Show Episodes

1. Had a dream inspired by Packed to the Rafters.

I've recently donated one of my kidneys. I'm not in pain. There's a woman at the place I'm staying. She tells me she's lost a kidney, and she has experienced all sorts of life difficulties. I think of the passage from the novel that talks about Aunt June having more than her share of problems.

2. Dreamed about bilbies, though I don't remember much—just something with me looking them up on the Internet.

3.  Knew that the novel I thought about, in the kidney dream, is by Jaclyn Moriarty; though I can't remember if the Aunt June passage is in the Ashbury High series, or The Spell Book of Listen Taylor.

I quoted the passage in my blog once, though. I'm going to try to find it.

4. Found that, back in October 2010, I wrote a whole blog post about Aunt June's bad luck.

The book was The Ghosts of Ashbury High.

5. Started to watch an episode of Neighbours.

6. Saw that the Australian Celebrity category of QuizUp has been updated.

I played a round, but didn't finish because I got disconnected from my opponent (Richard from Melbourne).

A lot of the questions were about reality TV stars. I don't know much about that.

7. Wondered if Paige (Olympia Valance) is finally going to tell her mother (Kate Kendall) about doing illegal work for Dimato (David Serafin).

I imagine Lauren won't be too happy with Dimato. It was bad enough for her to learn her husband (Josef Brown) was involved with Dimato.  I'm sure she'll be devastated to learn that Paige got tangled up in the mess as well.

Oh, and also her son Bailey (Calen MacKenzie) got himself into the mess!

8. Thought about how Amber (Jenna Rosenow) is the only member of the Turner family not touched by Dimato. But then I remembered she was harrassed by some of Dimato's gang for taking photographs.

9. Started to watch an episode of Packed to the Rafters.  

10. Disagreed with Jake (James Stewart). Rachel (Jessica Marais) tells him about how she believes her new coworker Liam (Kain O'Keeffe) is trying to sabatoge her.

Jake seems bemused about the whole situation, and skeptical about Rachel's side of the story.  When Rachel tells Jake about how she's trying to fight back, he says she should just be direct and tell Liam he's being a tool.

No, I don't think that works. If someone is nice to your face, and stabbing you in the back; calling them out on it is rarely going to work.

First of all, there's the chance that you're wrong.  Then you'll end up looking paranoid. Or you could be right, but the perpetrator denies it. And you have no tangible proof.  You'll still end up looking paranoid.

11. Thought that Jake's advice is similar to Susan's (Jackie Woodburne) advice to Terese (Rebekah Elmaloglou) on Neighbours.  When Terese learned that Paige is trying to sabatoge her marriage, Susan advices Terese to be direct and talk to Paige about it.

12. Wished I could agree with Susan and Jake. It would be nice if confrontation worked. But in my experience, it usually doesn't.

What's the alternative? Fight back.  Now that could be about going on the defensive or offensive. The former is probably more preferable.

It's probably enough for Rachel to work against Liam and make sure her career stays intact. If she wanted to be a baddie, she could also work to destroy his career.

It's probably enough for Terese to work to protect her marriage. She doesn't need to go as far as trying to destroy Paige.

13. Thought that the only time being confrontational might work is if someone's acting angry or acting like they don't like us. I think SOMETIMES it might help to ask them what's wrong, or ask, Do you not like me?  Are you angry about something?

I think sometimes they might tell the truth, or explain that they're not mad. They might explain that they're in a bad mood because stuff is going on in their life.

14. Thought about how sometimes I wonder if someone is mad, but I don't ask.

I guess I'm afraid, if they're not mad, I'll seem hypersensitive.

Or worse, they'll tell me they are mad, and it will turn into a fight.

15. Can't remember a time in recent history where I've asked somebody if they were mad at me.

16. Thought Jake was wrong in requesting that Rachel not talk about work on the weekends.

I think it's rarely a good idea to tell people that you don't want them to talk about certain things.

If someone talks too much about work, and hogs the conversation; it might not be horrible to ask them to tone it down a bit. It might not be horrible to try to change the subject.

17. Felt it was one thing asking someone not to work on the weekend. It's another thing to ask them not to talk to you about work.

As for asking someone not to work, that's sometimes unfair too.  Some people have intense jobs and work needs to be done. It's preferable if it's not done when they're supposed to be spending time with you.  There's a difference between someone carving out some time in the weekend to work on something quietly in their office and someone who often checks their texts when they're at a restaurant with you.

18. Worried that I've told Tim not to talk about work.

Have I?

I'm not sure.

Maybe I did.

Or maybe he accused me of not being a good listener when he talks about work. I can't remember, exactly.

Maybe I don't act or sound supportive enough?

19. Tried harder to remember.

I think it happened, at a time that I told him I don't tell him that much stuff anymore. I was mad at him for not seeming to notice or care. Then I think he said it went both ways—that he had stopped talking to me about work stuff.  I don't think I had noticed that until he mentioned it.

I probably am a bad listener, sometimes.  Well, I know I am, actually.

Sometimes I'm very good at it, and sometimes I'm awful.

19. Felt that sometimes I'm like Jake, and I  sort of defend the other person.

I mean if someone complains about someone; I don't immediately take their side. I sometimes feel sympathy for the person they're mad at.

Is that fair? Sometimes. But when I'm the one bitching and someone does that to me; I usually get annoyed.

It all depends on the situation, and how it's handled.

We can't expect everyone to completely take our side during our conflict. On the other hand, we deserve to at least be heard and have the other person TRY to understand our side of things.

20. Concluded that if someone is bitching about someone, it's not healthy or fair to completely and easily agree that the subject of the complaining is a worthless, evil pariah.

It's equally wrong, if someone is complaining about someone; to assume  that all the blame lies on the complainers lap— that they're just too sensitive or overdramatic.

21. Wondered what the hell Jake was thinking.

He doesn't listen well when Rachel complains about work. Then he turns around and threatens Rachel's coworker.

I have to admit it, though. In a way, I think it's kind of nice that he was protective.

I'm imagining myself complaining about someone and my listener acting totally unsympathetic. If they went ahead and tried to fight my battles for me, it would at least show they're on my side.  It just seems that being there to listen to me and say supportive things would be a better way of handling things.

22. Thought the main problem with Jake's behavior is that the reason he tried to handle things is because he felt Rachel was incapable of doing it herself. He accused her of acting like she was in high school. Yeah, because threatening to kick someone's ass is much more mature.

23. Decided Jake is being disrespectful.

24. Had a feeling that Jake and Rachel are going to break up.

25. Glad to see that Jake and Rachel did not break up.

Well, they sort of broke up.  I was kind of sad about that.

Then Rachel apologized, and Jake was decent enough to say that he was just as much to blame.

I think Jake was more to blame, personally. But it was nice and brave of Rachel to take the initiative.

26. Started to watch another episode of Packed to the Rafters.

27. Remembered that when we were in Halls Gap, I caught a few glimpses of Packed to the Rafters.

I guess someone had left the television on?  I don't think anyone was actually watching it.

I had already seen season one, and what I saw on the screen looked so different from what I was used to.  I remember my friend Tracey making a comment about how so much had changed.

I'm wondering what season and episode I got a glimpse of.

28. Thought that the episode was probably "Free to Choose" from season five. I'm trying not to read anything in the description. I don't want spoilers.

The episode aired on April 9, 2013. I think that was around the time we were in Halls Gap.

29. Looked at my Australia 2013 album, and clicked on a photo from Halls Gap. It says it was taken on April 9.  So I think I have the right episode!

30. Remembered watching a little bit of Neighbours with Tracey. I think this was when I first met her and her family. We stayed at their house in Tasmania.  She's a fan of the show, and I think she tried to watch an episode while we were there. I'm not sure she gave it all her attention. We probably chatted while it was on.

I have vague memories of there being a classroom, and maybe there had been a recent horrible tragedy?

It would have been February 2009.

31. Decided to get dates from Flickr again.

Found a picture from February 6, 2009.

I'm going to see if I can find a Neighbours episode from around that date.

I'm curious to know what actors were on the show back then.

32. Waiting for IMDb to give me the list of episode years.

It's taking a long time.

33. Saw that The Perfect Blend has episode summaries.

I'm going to look at the summary for the February 6, 2009 episode.

34. Saw that I'm right!

I'm so impressed with my memory.

It says here: The students sit down at their desks and Mr. Simpson explains to them that the school still has counselors in place and that they’ll be holding their own memorial for Zeke. Kyle then arrives and Declan can’t believe it. Mr. Simpson however invites Kyle in to take his seat.

The tragedy was the death of Zeke.

Though I don't think he really died.

Didn't I see Zeke in a recent behind-the-scenes video? He had a wedding?  He's related to Nate (Meyne Wyatt). Or am I thinking of someone else?

35. Consulted Lord Wiki.

Zeke is the right person.

He was believed to be dead, because of a school rafting trip accident. The boat capsized, and the only thing found was Zeke's lifejacket and helmet.

36. Learned that Zeke had amnesia.

37. Thought more about Mel dying on Packed to the Rafters.

Mel doesn't know she's going to die soon, but the actress who plays her (Zoe Ventoura) does know. In fact, it was probably Ventoura who decided to take Mel out of the show.

I was thinking that if there is a such thing as spiritual stuff, afterlives, and reincarnation; maybe it works like that.

Maybe the people that we are in this life are the characters. Our souls are the actors.

Our characters don't know when we're going to die. The actors (souls) do know, and they might have even picked the how and when of the whole thing.

38. Wondered if the soul can change it's mind.

Let's say Jenny's soul has it planned that she's going to drown next Wednesday. Could Jenny's soul change those plans without Jenny knowing about it?  Maybe she'd know on an unconscious level.

Maybe she'd have a nightmare about drowning.

39. Thought that the biggest problem with this theory is the whole Jesus-Judas type scenario.  It would mean there are no villains, but instead just instruments of fate.

If Jenny drowns because a serial killer strangles her, is the soul of the serial killer evil? Or is he just helping to fulfill what Jenny's soul has chosen to happen to herself?

40. Realized while thinking about murder and Australian TV characters that I've not seen many Australian characters killed by the hands of another.

Well, they have, actually. But accidentally. The only character I can think of, offhand, that was purposely killed is Kate (Ashleigh Brewer) on Neighbours. She was shot.

I've seen at least five Australian TV characters get hit by a car. None of them were hit on purpose.

41. Remembered that I watched City Homicide. Obviously, there were murders on that.  But I don't think any main characters ended up murdered.

42. Remembered that Rory on Home and Away got eaten by a shark.

Was the shark hungry? Or was he simply an instrument of fate?

43. Looked up the actor who played Rory on Home and Away.

Gregor Jordan...

He''s a director now.  He's the one who directed Ned Kelly, the one starring Heath Ledger.

I'm shocked by this, but feel I should have already learned it.

How would I have missed that piece of information?

44. Searched through my blog for Gregor Jordan.

I didn't find anything.

Well, that's good.

I'd hate knowing I've learned something so exciting; and then had forgotten about it.

44. Felt sad and stressed about the Rafter family and their troubles.

This episode is depressing.

And it's not even the one where Mel dies.

She's still alive.

45. Thought that if there's going to be a tragedy, it's going to happen when either A) the people involved are super happy about their lives B) the people are already stressed out and overwhelmed by their problems.

46. Learned that Dave's Dad Tom (John Howard) is a horrible man.

I thought his only crime was not being able to remember a woman he had sex with over forty years ago. But it turns out he wants Cody (Ryan Corr) to steal from Dave...his own son!

A few episodes back, Tom ask Cody to keep his eyes and ears open... or something like that. I guess I should have known something bad was stewing. I guess I hoped he just wanted Cody to spy a bit to make sure the Rafters were decent people.

Anyway, Cody is starting to like the Rafters, and feels bad about stealing from them. He tells Tom he wants to stop all of it, and Tom tries to manipulate him into continuing.

47. Decided to watch another episode of Packed to the Rafters.

48. Could relate to Mel when she heard Ben (Hugh McLaren) saying bad things about marriage to Cabo (George Houvardas).

Ben is trying to convince Cabo not to propose to his girlfriend.  In doing so, he makes marriage sound awful. How is Mel supposed to feel about that?

I never had that happen, exactly.

But it reminds me of a time that someone said something insulting about someone else; but the insult also totally applied to me. They seemed to forget I was there, or that what they said could also apply to me.

49. Decided to give a hypothetical example to illustrate my point. Let's say there's someone who has never said anything negative about me having a blog. But then when I'm in the room, I hear them talking to a friend. They say, She wastes so much time writing her blog. What a loser. She could be using that time for something much more worthwhile.

Of course then I'd confront the person and they make some lame excuse. No, your blog is fine. It's not like her blog at all. If you read her blog, you'd totally agree with me.

50. Saw that Jake and Rachel are probably going to break up again.  I think this time it might be permanent.

51. Had a feeling that Packed to the Rafters teased the viewers with an upcoming death.

In a few episodes, Mel is going to die in a car accident.

In the last episode I watched, Dave fell asleep at the wheel and got into a minor wreck.

In this episode, Jake gets behind the wheel when he's not supposed to because of his epilepsy.

I'm guessing fans of the show were told someone was going to die by the end of the season, and viewers were kept on edge.

52. Found a promo promising the death of a Rafter.

However, it says it's going to happen next Tuesday. So the Jake and Dave near miss would have already been seen. Plus, Jake is not a Rafter.

53. Felt bad for Cabo's girlfriend Loretta (Hannah Marshall). She's not really welcomed with open arms by Cabo's roommates. Then they make fun of her for being loud during sex.  They're kind of mean about it—laughing at her; not laughing with her.  Even when she shows proper embarrassment, they don't ease up.