1. Told by Tim that it was not right for me to try and discourage Australians from coming to America. It's not that he works for American tourism, or anything like that. He was just having the common sense I'm lacking. If Qantas can't fill up their airplanes, they're going to have to charge each person more to make up for the fuel cost. I didn't think of it that way.
I guess it has to be the perfect balance. If Qantas has too many Australians and Americans wanting to visit each other's countries, they can make it as expensive as they want. But if they don't have enough interested people, the few of us who want to travel would have to make it financially worthwhile for Qantas to do the flight.
2. Had lesbian-type dreams about Deborah Mailman....PG, rated. We were a couple. I think she was more Cherie than Deborah Mailman, but maybe not exactly Cherie. I like an outfit she wears. It involves 15 layers including two pairs of pants. At some point, she gets mad at me because I forget her last name. I try to defend myself saying it's not like we often refer to each other's last names. And it's not like I forgot her first name.
In another part, I think we held hands.
3. Saw the photo of the giant snake from Australia. I saw it yesterday too. It seems to be spreading. Am I the only one in the world who thinks it's beautiful and amazing? Supposedly, it's a King Brown snake, so might be a bit dangerous.
The person who posted the photo says the King Brown snake is part of the cobra family, and most other Australian snakes are as well. I didn't know that, and I'm kind of thinking maybe she got that wrong. Or maybe I'm wrong. It's not like I'm a snake expert.
4. Consulted Lord Wiki about Pseudechis Australis, otherwise known as the King Brown snake.
I'm trying to figure out the whole cobra thing. Lord Wiki says that in 1842, a scientist placed in in the cobra family. But it looks like that was later changed. Now its Genus is Pseudechis.
Lord Wiki has a list of cobra species. As far as I can see, there's none in Australia.
5. Felt selfish when I read comments on the Qantas Facebook Page. They asked what people would do if they won ten thousand dollars. Robyn Rickey says, To fly home and see my family in Australia. With 4 kids (2 at adult fair!) it's incredibly expensive to travel home every year to see everyone. Heartbreaking! Qantas you should have special rates for all Aussies returning home!! All the time :)
I didn't even think about that. Plane ticket prices aren't just a problem for tourist fans like myself. What about all the people who want to visit their family? It's really sad.
I hope soon they figure out a cheap and easier way to travel.
You know what I think about. Phones. I remember in the 1990's, it was so expensive to make long distance phone calls, and I'm just talking domestic calls. I remember worrying about phone bills. Now it's pretty much a non-issue. First of all, I rarely call anyone because I can just email them. But also, the phone rates went down. It's pretty affordable to make international calls. Oh! And you can use video chat which is free, I think.
So I'm hoping what happened with the phones will happen with travel. I'm hoping someone will come up with an invention that will make it easy and affordable to travel overseas.
6. Watched trailer for Snowtown. It's about a serial killer. It doesn't look like something I'd like. I heard about it from the Australian Film Festival Facebook Page.
7. Read article about Bob Brown wanting to increase the mining tax. I probably don't understand most of it, but I find his quote here interesting. How is it that so few are benefiting from the country's wealth? Yeah. I don't know. I keep hearing about how Australia's economy is doing so well, and that's because of the great mining boom. But is it really helping average Australians? Is it helping cyclone victims in Queensland?
8. Read another story about the economy. I'm really getting the idea that Australia is NOT doing well despite the mining boom. It might not be doing horrible. I won't go that far. But it doesn't seem to be doing that great. The article says that employment rates are decreasing. Jobs are disappearing because of retail and manufacturing expenses. Supposedly, this is due to the rising Aussie dollar.
It's too bad there's not some easy way to fix all this.
9. Started watching episode #6 of Offspring.
10. Wondered how much dating in Offspring reflects real dating in Australia. Is it typical for people to have sex on the first date? I haven't dated in a long time, and I've always been a bit of a prude. But in my little world, people usually see each other several times (or at least a few times) before they have sex. In Offspring, there was the assumption that sex would happen on the first date. And also it was like a sex date. Let's go straight to your place. What happened to let's have dinner or let's go see a movie or let's go to a concert?
Maybe it's an age thing? I haven't been a single woman since I was twenty-three. Maybe when you're younger it's more typical to wait a bit. Maybe single women in their thirties and forties jump into bed faster?
11. Realized that my minor crush on Dr. Chris Havel has already ended. That was disappointingly short. I think I'm no longer capable of sustainable celebrity and character crushes. That's probably a good thing, I suppose.
12. Read article about Patrick McGorry wanting kids to be given mental health tests at age three. What some people don't seem to understand is that there's no magical test you can give to people to determine if they're mentally ill or not. It's based on opinion. It's not like getting a Strep culture or Pap Smear.
I think two things need to happen. First of all, parents themselves should be educated to look out for certain signs. Parents know their children the best. They're the ones who should make the diagnosis. Then doctors should learn to listen to parents and take their concerns seriously.
If a child has severe autism, I think by age three the parents should be able to see this...if they know what to look for. If the autism is very mild or they have Aspergers, it's probably not a big issue anyway.
If your child is happy, social, and intelligent do you really need to worry if they like to obsessively line up their toys or get fixated on a certain topic.? Oh no! Oh no! My child is so obsessed with trains. He knows every line in the city. He has it all memorized!
Yes, let's get him some early intervention because it sounds like he might have that tragic autism thing.
But really. If a child is severely autistic—not talking and not connecting, I think parents can pick up on that fact. And if they're ignorant about autism; or in denial, the pediatrician can ask some questions to get a vague picture of what might be happening.
13. Realized from Facebook that today is Friday the 13th in Australia. Cool. We spent a Friday the 13th in Australia. It was the day we drove from Canberra to Gerroa.
14. Frustrated because Blogger hasn't been working for a few hours. But I'm not going to complain too much. It's really nice and generous that Blogger provides this service to us for free. I don't often enough show gratitude for that. So if they have a few bugs in the system they need to work out, that's okay. I hope everything works out for them.
15. Figured it is good that Blogger is down because I really miss it. Missing it is really making me appreciate it more. I hope it's back when we return from dinner though. This is a challenging social occasion for me. Very challenging. Most social occasions are challenging for me, but this one is particularly so. It will be nice to return from the challenge and see Blogger is all fixed and waiting.
If not, I will lose my mind and have a huge violent tantrum.
No, I'm joking. I'll be fine.
16. Survived the social encounter...barely. I returned home to find Blogger is still not working.
17. Decided to warn people never to listen to me when it comes to our Australia plans. Well, you can listen to me, but don't put any faith into anything I say. I change my mind every five minutes.
18. Went for the spiritual route and asked to be given a sign about whether or not we should go to Australia. Then I remembered what I've told other people about this. If you have a tough question and you want some kind of spiritual answer; it's not the signs or answer that matter. It's what you WANT to hear that matters. If you ask the magic eight ball should I take this job or not; it says yes; and you're disappointed to hear that, then you shouldn't take the job.
Anyway, I realized when I was thinking about asking the question, that there was a definite answer I wanted. I want to be told (in some magical mystical way) that it's okay for us to go to Australia. I do NOT want to hear that it's the wrong decision.
Now I do believe in spiritual messages, but I personally feel they come when we're not asking a question. I think we just get signs, because something out there wants to tell us something. I'm guessing that when we directly ask the question, our spirit guides roll their eyes and say, Figure it out yourself. If we wanted to give you advice or guidance we would have already done so.
19. Realized that in order for me to know I wanted to go to Australia, I had to cancel the trip. I thought that's what I wanted, but I ended up feeling more sad than relieved.
It kind of reminds me of that episode of Friends. Rachel goes to take the pregnancy test, and she's not sure how she feels. Does she want to be pregnant? Does she not want to be pregnant? Then Phoebe reads the test and tells Rachel she's not pregnant. Rachel expected to feel relieved, but instead she cries with disappointment. Then it turns out Rachel was pregnant and Phoebe did all that to make her realize she wanted to be pregnant. Although then there's hints of how it might have been a mistake if Rachel wasn't disappointed and instead very relieved. Then how do you say, Ah....just kidding. Stop acting so relieved. You are pregnant!
20. Wondered if I'm being overdramatic by comparing a trip to Australia with a pregnancy. Probably.
21. Decided if Blogger is not back on by the time I go to bed, I will just double this post up with tomorrow's post and publish it all tomorrow night.
What is Blogger's not running by tomorrow night?
Scary!
22. Found out Magnum Ice-Cream bars are now in America. Or at least they're coming. They're not Australian, but they remind me of Australia because that's where we first ate them. Now we need to get the Golden Gaytime ice-cream.
23. Woke up for find that Blogger is still down. Yikes! I can imagine they're feeling incredibly stressed and horrible. What's weird is yesterday I read that all posts written on Wednesday had vanished. I checked mine and it was still there. Then this morning I checked and it was gone. That's all very mysterious. Blogger says they're trying to restore all these lost posts.
24. Liked this photo from the Australia Facebook Page photo album. It's shoes on a beach. I love leaving my shoes on the beach and taking a walk. Although one time I lost my shoes and panicked a bit. But eventually I found them.
25. Read article about man who caused havoc in Sydney by protesting on the Harbour Bridge. What did he want? It had something to do with his kids; a custody thing. I don't think it matters much. Once you use such tactics, I think the message becomes tainted. It loses its value.
I am grateful that he didn't use terrorism. He didn't attempt to blow up innocent people to get his message across. That's good.
But he still caused great annoyance to people. And he made Sydney lose money by making folks late to work.
Is there any time an action like this is merited? I'm doubting it. There's many good causes out there; but it seems to me the best and most fair way to make changes is to speak out, write letters, send emails, form petitions, model desired behavior, etc. It can be a slow and frustrating process, but I'm not sure the alternatives bring about positive change.
26. Very happy to see that Blogger has returned!
27. Saw that Blogger has not restored the posts that vanished from 11 May. Are they still planning to do that? I still have my post in drafts, but I'm not sure if it's the whole post. I forgot where I ended it.
28. Read very nice apology post from Blogger. What a nightmare! They're trying to get everything restored.
I talked to Tim about it and he agrees with me. It's not right to act angry towards a service that you get for free. I think it's okay to get sad and frustrated at the situation, but not towards the people who provide the service. Mistakes and malfunctions happen sometime. I admire Blogger for working hard to remedy the problem; and I admire them for acting professional and apologetic.
I'm less okay when I pay a lot of money for a service and a mistake is made; although I forgive easily if I feel apologies and remedies are offered. I'm also less okay (whether service is free or a paid for) when rudeness is involved.
29. Realized I had two #10's on my blog and had to fix, that rendering what I said in #13 untrue. So I'm deleting it. But I'm going to repost it here so you can see:
It's too bad this is item #12 instead of 13. If only I had thought of something else to say before noticing it was Friday the 13th. That would have been cool. Although people would probably be sceptical of the coincidence. They'd probably think I faked it.
I don't know if anyone is going to believe me, but I will say that I'm not making any of that up. I don't know if I really had two #10's or if something went wrong. Around the time that I noticed that issue, I also noticed the post to this title vanished. It could be a blogger issue.
Now I have to struggle to remember the title of this post. Or maybe I'll just come up with something new.
30. Figured out that I actually did write two #10's. Yesterday when Blogger stopped being able to save my post, I cut and pasted part of it (starting with #7) to TextEdit. There're two #10s there as well.
31. Decided to add unreliability to the title of this post. I think it's a relevant word. You can't rely on anything 100%....not even blogger. And you can't rely on my travel plans. Sometimes they happen the way I say they're going to happen, but often they do not. If you want an accurate idea of our travels, it's much better to wait until AFTER they've happened.
32. Saw that my May 11 post is back. The labels look weird. I wonder what's up with that.
33. Started watching episode 7 of Offspring. I hope I like it better than episode 6. I think episode 6 was my least favorite so far.
34. Struggled with feeling like I'm four people in one. There's the weird blogger Dina who's obsessed with Australia. Then I feel like I'm the British Muggle and her witchy sister living in Australia. On top of all that, this weekend I'm teenage dorky loser Dina. Why? My cousin is here, and when I'm with her plus my sisters I just feel like a total loser.
Do other people have this type of identity crisis?
Whatever. I'll just embrace my weirdness. I guess it makes life more interesting.
Maybe that's why I like Offspring. Nina Proudman is a bit mental like me. And she still manages to deliver babies.
35. Thought of something positive. Out of all the personalities in me right now, I like the real me the best. I love being a blogger obsessed with Australia. I love being Jack's mom. I love being Tim's wife. I love my life. I do adore the little Muggle. I have to admit that. And she gets to live in Australia. So maybe it's nice I get to be her sometimes. Maybe she's the teenager I wish I had been.
I'm sitting here realizing that I have no love for my past self. Is that awful? I think it is, because I felt so unloved when I was young. What if my past self knew that even her future self didn't like her? That's really horrible.
It's bad because I wasn't a bad person. I was okay; just a bit pathetic.
Bits and pieces of that pathetic teen come out almost every time I'm with my sister. I'm afraid that with my cousin there, the pathetic Dina will come out all the way.
36. Decided to sing, exercise, and blog a lot this weekend. Those three things usually make me feel better about myself.
I guess it has to be the perfect balance. If Qantas has too many Australians and Americans wanting to visit each other's countries, they can make it as expensive as they want. But if they don't have enough interested people, the few of us who want to travel would have to make it financially worthwhile for Qantas to do the flight.
2. Had lesbian-type dreams about Deborah Mailman....PG, rated. We were a couple. I think she was more Cherie than Deborah Mailman, but maybe not exactly Cherie. I like an outfit she wears. It involves 15 layers including two pairs of pants. At some point, she gets mad at me because I forget her last name. I try to defend myself saying it's not like we often refer to each other's last names. And it's not like I forgot her first name.
In another part, I think we held hands.
3. Saw the photo of the giant snake from Australia. I saw it yesterday too. It seems to be spreading. Am I the only one in the world who thinks it's beautiful and amazing? Supposedly, it's a King Brown snake, so might be a bit dangerous.
The person who posted the photo says the King Brown snake is part of the cobra family, and most other Australian snakes are as well. I didn't know that, and I'm kind of thinking maybe she got that wrong. Or maybe I'm wrong. It's not like I'm a snake expert.
4. Consulted Lord Wiki about Pseudechis Australis, otherwise known as the King Brown snake.
I'm trying to figure out the whole cobra thing. Lord Wiki says that in 1842, a scientist placed in in the cobra family. But it looks like that was later changed. Now its Genus is Pseudechis.
Lord Wiki has a list of cobra species. As far as I can see, there's none in Australia.
5. Felt selfish when I read comments on the Qantas Facebook Page. They asked what people would do if they won ten thousand dollars. Robyn Rickey says, To fly home and see my family in Australia. With 4 kids (2 at adult fair!) it's incredibly expensive to travel home every year to see everyone. Heartbreaking! Qantas you should have special rates for all Aussies returning home!! All the time :)
I didn't even think about that. Plane ticket prices aren't just a problem for tourist fans like myself. What about all the people who want to visit their family? It's really sad.
I hope soon they figure out a cheap and easier way to travel.
You know what I think about. Phones. I remember in the 1990's, it was so expensive to make long distance phone calls, and I'm just talking domestic calls. I remember worrying about phone bills. Now it's pretty much a non-issue. First of all, I rarely call anyone because I can just email them. But also, the phone rates went down. It's pretty affordable to make international calls. Oh! And you can use video chat which is free, I think.
So I'm hoping what happened with the phones will happen with travel. I'm hoping someone will come up with an invention that will make it easy and affordable to travel overseas.
6. Watched trailer for Snowtown. It's about a serial killer. It doesn't look like something I'd like. I heard about it from the Australian Film Festival Facebook Page.
7. Read article about Bob Brown wanting to increase the mining tax. I probably don't understand most of it, but I find his quote here interesting. How is it that so few are benefiting from the country's wealth? Yeah. I don't know. I keep hearing about how Australia's economy is doing so well, and that's because of the great mining boom. But is it really helping average Australians? Is it helping cyclone victims in Queensland?
8. Read another story about the economy. I'm really getting the idea that Australia is NOT doing well despite the mining boom. It might not be doing horrible. I won't go that far. But it doesn't seem to be doing that great. The article says that employment rates are decreasing. Jobs are disappearing because of retail and manufacturing expenses. Supposedly, this is due to the rising Aussie dollar.
It's too bad there's not some easy way to fix all this.
9. Started watching episode #6 of Offspring.
10. Wondered how much dating in Offspring reflects real dating in Australia. Is it typical for people to have sex on the first date? I haven't dated in a long time, and I've always been a bit of a prude. But in my little world, people usually see each other several times (or at least a few times) before they have sex. In Offspring, there was the assumption that sex would happen on the first date. And also it was like a sex date. Let's go straight to your place. What happened to let's have dinner or let's go see a movie or let's go to a concert?
Maybe it's an age thing? I haven't been a single woman since I was twenty-three. Maybe when you're younger it's more typical to wait a bit. Maybe single women in their thirties and forties jump into bed faster?
11. Realized that my minor crush on Dr. Chris Havel has already ended. That was disappointingly short. I think I'm no longer capable of sustainable celebrity and character crushes. That's probably a good thing, I suppose.
12. Read article about Patrick McGorry wanting kids to be given mental health tests at age three. What some people don't seem to understand is that there's no magical test you can give to people to determine if they're mentally ill or not. It's based on opinion. It's not like getting a Strep culture or Pap Smear.
I think two things need to happen. First of all, parents themselves should be educated to look out for certain signs. Parents know their children the best. They're the ones who should make the diagnosis. Then doctors should learn to listen to parents and take their concerns seriously.
If a child has severe autism, I think by age three the parents should be able to see this...if they know what to look for. If the autism is very mild or they have Aspergers, it's probably not a big issue anyway.
If your child is happy, social, and intelligent do you really need to worry if they like to obsessively line up their toys or get fixated on a certain topic.? Oh no! Oh no! My child is so obsessed with trains. He knows every line in the city. He has it all memorized!
Yes, let's get him some early intervention because it sounds like he might have that tragic autism thing.
But really. If a child is severely autistic—not talking and not connecting, I think parents can pick up on that fact. And if they're ignorant about autism; or in denial, the pediatrician can ask some questions to get a vague picture of what might be happening.
13. Realized from Facebook that today is Friday the 13th in Australia. Cool. We spent a Friday the 13th in Australia. It was the day we drove from Canberra to Gerroa.
14. Frustrated because Blogger hasn't been working for a few hours. But I'm not going to complain too much. It's really nice and generous that Blogger provides this service to us for free. I don't often enough show gratitude for that. So if they have a few bugs in the system they need to work out, that's okay. I hope everything works out for them.
15. Figured it is good that Blogger is down because I really miss it. Missing it is really making me appreciate it more. I hope it's back when we return from dinner though. This is a challenging social occasion for me. Very challenging. Most social occasions are challenging for me, but this one is particularly so. It will be nice to return from the challenge and see Blogger is all fixed and waiting.
If not, I will lose my mind and have a huge violent tantrum.
No, I'm joking. I'll be fine.
16. Survived the social encounter...barely. I returned home to find Blogger is still not working.
17. Decided to warn people never to listen to me when it comes to our Australia plans. Well, you can listen to me, but don't put any faith into anything I say. I change my mind every five minutes.
18. Went for the spiritual route and asked to be given a sign about whether or not we should go to Australia. Then I remembered what I've told other people about this. If you have a tough question and you want some kind of spiritual answer; it's not the signs or answer that matter. It's what you WANT to hear that matters. If you ask the magic eight ball should I take this job or not; it says yes; and you're disappointed to hear that, then you shouldn't take the job.
Anyway, I realized when I was thinking about asking the question, that there was a definite answer I wanted. I want to be told (in some magical mystical way) that it's okay for us to go to Australia. I do NOT want to hear that it's the wrong decision.
Now I do believe in spiritual messages, but I personally feel they come when we're not asking a question. I think we just get signs, because something out there wants to tell us something. I'm guessing that when we directly ask the question, our spirit guides roll their eyes and say, Figure it out yourself. If we wanted to give you advice or guidance we would have already done so.
19. Realized that in order for me to know I wanted to go to Australia, I had to cancel the trip. I thought that's what I wanted, but I ended up feeling more sad than relieved.
It kind of reminds me of that episode of Friends. Rachel goes to take the pregnancy test, and she's not sure how she feels. Does she want to be pregnant? Does she not want to be pregnant? Then Phoebe reads the test and tells Rachel she's not pregnant. Rachel expected to feel relieved, but instead she cries with disappointment. Then it turns out Rachel was pregnant and Phoebe did all that to make her realize she wanted to be pregnant. Although then there's hints of how it might have been a mistake if Rachel wasn't disappointed and instead very relieved. Then how do you say, Ah....just kidding. Stop acting so relieved. You are pregnant!
20. Wondered if I'm being overdramatic by comparing a trip to Australia with a pregnancy. Probably.
21. Decided if Blogger is not back on by the time I go to bed, I will just double this post up with tomorrow's post and publish it all tomorrow night.
What is Blogger's not running by tomorrow night?
Scary!
22. Found out Magnum Ice-Cream bars are now in America. Or at least they're coming. They're not Australian, but they remind me of Australia because that's where we first ate them. Now we need to get the Golden Gaytime ice-cream.
23. Woke up for find that Blogger is still down. Yikes! I can imagine they're feeling incredibly stressed and horrible. What's weird is yesterday I read that all posts written on Wednesday had vanished. I checked mine and it was still there. Then this morning I checked and it was gone. That's all very mysterious. Blogger says they're trying to restore all these lost posts.
24. Liked this photo from the Australia Facebook Page photo album. It's shoes on a beach. I love leaving my shoes on the beach and taking a walk. Although one time I lost my shoes and panicked a bit. But eventually I found them.
25. Read article about man who caused havoc in Sydney by protesting on the Harbour Bridge. What did he want? It had something to do with his kids; a custody thing. I don't think it matters much. Once you use such tactics, I think the message becomes tainted. It loses its value.
I am grateful that he didn't use terrorism. He didn't attempt to blow up innocent people to get his message across. That's good.
But he still caused great annoyance to people. And he made Sydney lose money by making folks late to work.
Is there any time an action like this is merited? I'm doubting it. There's many good causes out there; but it seems to me the best and most fair way to make changes is to speak out, write letters, send emails, form petitions, model desired behavior, etc. It can be a slow and frustrating process, but I'm not sure the alternatives bring about positive change.
26. Very happy to see that Blogger has returned!
27. Saw that Blogger has not restored the posts that vanished from 11 May. Are they still planning to do that? I still have my post in drafts, but I'm not sure if it's the whole post. I forgot where I ended it.
28. Read very nice apology post from Blogger. What a nightmare! They're trying to get everything restored.
I talked to Tim about it and he agrees with me. It's not right to act angry towards a service that you get for free. I think it's okay to get sad and frustrated at the situation, but not towards the people who provide the service. Mistakes and malfunctions happen sometime. I admire Blogger for working hard to remedy the problem; and I admire them for acting professional and apologetic.
I'm less okay when I pay a lot of money for a service and a mistake is made; although I forgive easily if I feel apologies and remedies are offered. I'm also less okay (whether service is free or a paid for) when rudeness is involved.
29. Realized I had two #10's on my blog and had to fix, that rendering what I said in #13 untrue. So I'm deleting it. But I'm going to repost it here so you can see:
It's too bad this is item #12 instead of 13. If only I had thought of something else to say before noticing it was Friday the 13th. That would have been cool. Although people would probably be sceptical of the coincidence. They'd probably think I faked it.
I don't know if anyone is going to believe me, but I will say that I'm not making any of that up. I don't know if I really had two #10's or if something went wrong. Around the time that I noticed that issue, I also noticed the post to this title vanished. It could be a blogger issue.
Now I have to struggle to remember the title of this post. Or maybe I'll just come up with something new.
30. Figured out that I actually did write two #10's. Yesterday when Blogger stopped being able to save my post, I cut and pasted part of it (starting with #7) to TextEdit. There're two #10s there as well.
31. Decided to add unreliability to the title of this post. I think it's a relevant word. You can't rely on anything 100%....not even blogger. And you can't rely on my travel plans. Sometimes they happen the way I say they're going to happen, but often they do not. If you want an accurate idea of our travels, it's much better to wait until AFTER they've happened.
32. Saw that my May 11 post is back. The labels look weird. I wonder what's up with that.
33. Started watching episode 7 of Offspring. I hope I like it better than episode 6. I think episode 6 was my least favorite so far.
34. Struggled with feeling like I'm four people in one. There's the weird blogger Dina who's obsessed with Australia. Then I feel like I'm the British Muggle and her witchy sister living in Australia. On top of all that, this weekend I'm teenage dorky loser Dina. Why? My cousin is here, and when I'm with her plus my sisters I just feel like a total loser.
Do other people have this type of identity crisis?
Whatever. I'll just embrace my weirdness. I guess it makes life more interesting.
Maybe that's why I like Offspring. Nina Proudman is a bit mental like me. And she still manages to deliver babies.
35. Thought of something positive. Out of all the personalities in me right now, I like the real me the best. I love being a blogger obsessed with Australia. I love being Jack's mom. I love being Tim's wife. I love my life. I do adore the little Muggle. I have to admit that. And she gets to live in Australia. So maybe it's nice I get to be her sometimes. Maybe she's the teenager I wish I had been.
I'm sitting here realizing that I have no love for my past self. Is that awful? I think it is, because I felt so unloved when I was young. What if my past self knew that even her future self didn't like her? That's really horrible.
It's bad because I wasn't a bad person. I was okay; just a bit pathetic.
Bits and pieces of that pathetic teen come out almost every time I'm with my sister. I'm afraid that with my cousin there, the pathetic Dina will come out all the way.
36. Decided to sing, exercise, and blog a lot this weekend. Those three things usually make me feel better about myself.
