Matt Smith and Melbourne

Today we plan to start watching season 4 of the new Doctor Who series. It's the last season with David Tennant and then we move onto Matt Smith. I'm very attached to David Tennant as The Doctor, and am not feeling at all eager to see Matt Smith take over the role.

I was thinking last night that my feelings toward Matt Smith mirror my feelings towards Melbourne.

When I first became obsessed with Australia, it was hard for me to tell if I was obsessed with Australia in general or just specifically Sydney. 

I did feel an attraction to general Australia, but my attraction to Sydney was definitely more intense.

And I've always had ambivalent feelings towards Melbourne. I felt pressured to like it, and I wanted to like it. But it might have been the Australia place that attracted me the least.

Why did we end up going there then? I think part of it was I felt pressured to go there. People seemed curious about whether I would like it, and they wanted me to like it. I think I started to feel the same. I mean I became very curious about what my own feelings would be.

I'm feeling the same name about Matt Smith. I dread season 5 but, at the same time, I'm very eager to get there. I want to know how I'm going to feel. Am I going to miss David Tennant horribly and want to quit watching? Or will I be okay with Matt Smith? What if I actually end up liking him more than David Tennant? What if I become totally obsessed with Matt Smith and end up buying one of those Bow-Ties-are-Cool t-shirts?

As for Melbourne. I did like it...a lot. But I'm not sure I loved it in the way that I loved Sydney.  With Sydney I was dying to return. With Melbourne, my attitude was more along the lines of, that was great! But let's go somewhere else next time.

That being said, I've also lost interested in returning to Sydney the next time we visit. Although it took me three visits to feel that way.  The main reason I don't want to return is that I want the chance to see other places in Australia. We're limited by money. If I won the lottery and we could take many flights and had a ton of time, I'd want to return to Sydney. But if that happened, I probably would like to return to Melbourne as well.

So....

What am I saying?

Who knows. I'm confused. 

Well, I know what I'm saying. I know what's going on in my mind. I just don't really know what's going on deep in my heart...when it comes to Australia. And I have no idea how I'll feel about season 5 of Doctor Who.