Monday, December 21, 2009

The Woman From Bundaberg

I'm going to share yet another dream. It was kind of funny. There were two separate dreams, and then the storyline in both came together for a third.

In the first dream: I have lumps inside my mouth. They're a bit ugly and worrisome, and they cause some pain. I keep it a secret from everyone, maybe because I feel embarrassed.

I finally tell my mom about the lumps, and there's some amount of relief in telling her.
She acts somewhat interested and sympathetic, but mostly dismissive. She has the attitude that we shouldn't worry about it too much. She does offer the idea of going to a doctor, but says they probably won't be able to do much about it. She also says that if they do end up doing something, it will probably be very painful.

In the second dream: Tim gives me a book to read. I start reading it. The plot confuses me at first. But then I realize it's about a man who whose best friend is a woman. The two best friends live together. Then the man finds a wife and gets married. The female friend continues to live with them.

Since Tim and I once had his female friend living with us, I'm wondering what Tim's motive is in giving me the book. Did he not know the plot of the novel? Is it just a coincidence? OR.... did he give me the book to be sympathetic, a way to say...hey look. Other people have gone through what we went through. OR... is he trying to prove a point? Maybe he is trying to show me that OTHER wives can handle a second woman living in the house. Why couldn't I? I feel maybe Tim is trying to prove to me that I had been intolerant. I start thinking though that it's different when the female friend came BEFORE the marriage. You can't expect old friendships to break apart. You can't kick someone out of the house if they already lived there. But It's much different when the friend came into the man's life AFTER the marriage began.
In the third dream: The whole family decides to go to the mall to do our holiday shopping. (Actually, it might not be the whole family at first. The number of family members seems to change throughout the dream.) We plan to leave soon, and I want to brush my hair and put on some make-up. I'm too lazy though, and I procrastinate. The next thing I know we're all heading to the car. I complain about this, try to make people feel guilty for not giving me enough time to get ready. But I do secretly understand it's my fault for waiting until the last minute.

We seem to have started off in a car, but then it switches to us all being on a bus. I tell my younger sister Melissa about the lumps in my mouth. She tells her husband, who is a doctor. He asks me some questions about them. But on the whole, he acts dismissive. He acts as if he's humoring me....as if I'm bothering him for a trivial reason. He finally suggests that maybe there's a mind/body connection and the more I talk about the lumps, the more they'll be there. I get very angry and snap at him. I lecture him about his attitude. When we arrive at the mall, I'm still angry. For some reason, I'm not just angry at my brother-in-law. I'm angry at everyone. I walk purposely slow, and let the others go without me. They don't seem to notice my absence. I then walk in the opposite direction. (escaping my family is a common theme in my dreams).

Later, things seem to be okay again. I spend some time with my dad. I think about how everyone is staying together, and how that's going to make it hard for everyone to buy each other gifts. I worry about what to get my dad, and then decide to let Tim handle that.

At one point, I'm with my older sister. We look at these scarves that have become popular for hair. Our only encounter with them has been with my sister's daughter. She wore one once. I start thinking that I might want a scarf. I like the black one. We talk to the saleswoman who is dark-skinned. She has a slight accent. I can't tell if it might be British or Australian. I'm curious, but too shy and embarrassed to ask.

We leave the store with my curiosity not satisfied. Then somehow outside the store (although in beginning, it seemed the scarves were at a kiosk, and not a store) I find information written down about the woman at the store. It turns out she's the one who wrote the book that Tim gave me. The article says she's from Bundaberg, and something it says gives me the idea that she's an indigenous Australian. (because I guess her skin color wasn't a big enough clue).

I forgot my shyness and rush back into the store. I start babbling like an insane person, asking if she's from Australia and whether she's....I can't decide whether to say Aboriginal or Indiginous. I choose the latter. I tell her about my blog. I tell her I usually read only Australian books....unless someone gives me a book...then I'll read that. Then I ramble on and on about how I'm obsessed with Australia, and how I have a blog about Australia. I tell her that I usually read only Australian books, but if someone gives me another type of book I'll read that. I think it's so funny that the book I thought to be NOT Australian turns out to have been written from a woman from Bundaberg.

Basically, I make a fool of myself. I want the woman to like me. But I can tell she's listening just to be polite. And she probably thinks I'm too much of a complete freak.

Later, after the mall....we have three or four new bottles of shampoo. I end up drinking/eating an entire bottle of one of them. I do it without thinking. After the deed is done, I have regrets, and worry a bit.

The last dream I can remember having, about a shampoo bottle, was the one in which someone gave me a gift that was supposed to be from Julian McMahon. It was a shampoo bottle with Australian animals on top of it. This was one of the first clues I had that the frequent McMahon dreams were going to lead me into this whole Australia thing.

I wonder if this current dream is connected somehow. It could be symbolic of something. Will I ever know what it is? I doubt it. All I know is....I still feel grossed out about eating that shampoo. Yuck.