Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Apology

I love this article about some sports guy Farah apologizing to Julia Gillard. 

He got angry at a troll for saying bad things about his mum.

Then a bit after that, he apologized to Gillard for saying she should get a noose for a gift.

I'm not sure if he remembered his own meanness, or someone else helped him remember.

Either way....Karma in action.

I'm not going to take Farah's apology lightly.

Sometimes we don't realize we've done something wrong until it has been done to us.

I actually respect Farah because he apologized.   Some people don't apologize. Some won't admit they've done wrong. Some "forget" it ever happened.

I'm never sure if they really forgot, or if they're just faking it.

So, it takes courage to sit there and say, Yeah. I did the same thing once. Sorry.

Then again. I probably shouldn't give too much credit to Farah. He's a celebrity. If you're a celebrity, it's probably harder to hide.

I bet celebrities give more apologizes than us not-celebrities.

The article made me think of people on the internet who've been mean to me.  Some were mildly mean, and I can't say I didn't somewhat maybe deserve it.  Others were horribly mean, and I definitely did NOT deserve it.

I fantasize about them apologizing—I mean the really mean ones, and the ones who were in vocal and/or quiet support of the extreme meanness.

I doubt it will ever happen. It's been years already.....

I probably need hell to freeze over first.  Or pigs to fly.  

What bothers me the most is imagining these bloggers have forgotten or denied what they've done...even after having karma bite them on the ass.    Like if they've done what Farah's done—spoken out against trolling or other internet awfulness.

What if bad stuff is bad when it happens to them or their loved ones, but they're perfectly okay with it happening to people outside their tight circle?

What if they feel it's wrong to call people names and encourage them to harm themselves, but it's perfectly okay that they did it to me?   

All that makes me sad.  

5 comments:

FruitCake said...

Ooooh... I fear that if I went all satirically trollish it would not seem funny so shall exercise an AWFUL lot of self-discipline and behave myselves for once.

How's this for karma? - I have no idea who this Farah person is, nor do I care. If he is apologising because there is no such thing as bad publicity, then his ploy has failed miserably - with me at least.

As for karma, it would be so much more satisfyingerer if we could watch it happening. In the absence of evidence, we simply have to trust it does.
Let's say someone called Fred accidentally trips up a little old lady in a shopping mall and she falls over and goes thump thump thump down an escalator. For a split second he thinks he should apologise and help her up. Nah, stuff it, he decides - he's in a rush and it's too far to go down and help her.
The next day the karma master arranges for someone to accidentally bump him and he has his man bits crushed in some nearby machinery.
Well, the karma has happened but he isn't going to tell anyone is he? He'd be too embarrassed. Or still speechless with agony. But also, he would not make the connection between the two accidental bumps.

So it happens. In karma we can trust.

Dina said...

For me, proper Karma would not be about the guy getting his balls smashed. What would need to happen is someone be there observing; and then not helping. He or she would just stare as the man once stared at the falling lady.

Then maybe THIS would make him realize that it was wrong for him to have not helped the women.

I can't imagine he could go around searching for this old woman. But if the Karma was successful, he'd try to help injured people in the future. Well, as much as he could with his man bits missing. Maybe it would be hard for him to walk? The injured person might need to wait patiently to be assisted by this man.

I'm not a fan of Karma that punishes people for no reason.

That might be the case though. It's not like my wishes rule the universe.

I'd be disappointed though.

Not that Karma can force a person to change; or be regretful. But I think maybe that's what it's pushing for.

FruitCake said...

If the [former] man has his orchestras crushed [sorry, that's rhyming slang, 'orchestra stalls']
-where was I?
Oh yeah, he has his orchestras crushed. That would not be karma that punishes him for no reason - that would be karma as in revenge.

But maybe I'm misinterpreting this whole karma thing. Maybe karma is not about revenge but about a lesson. I think this is what you are driving at.

So, the [now] soprano would learn his lesson, and help others in future - bystanders assuming from his walk and high-pitched voice that he is a hairdresser - but even if he helped others, it still doesn't mean the particular little old lady in question who went thump thump thump will ever know about it.
So from her perspective it's not really gratifying. For her to derive personal benefit she must know he is not in denial when karma bites him on the khyber? But if she cannot know, she can only trust that karma happens.

Or for you is the dog barking in the forest thing enough? It doesn't matter who hears him barking, so long as someone hears it, and so long as he learns his lesson due to a blinding flash of insight.?

Dina said...

Fruitcake,

Thanks.

You made me realize something.

Ha. Sometimes we don't need Karma to teach us a lesson. We just need a fellow blogger across a big ocean.

I'm selfishly wishing for this apology. But what I should hope for is that these women just stop being bitches in general.

Isn't it enough that they don't verbally abuse someone else, or reject someone else for having an opposing opinion?

I DO wish they'd feel regret for what they did to me. I can't help but have that selfish though.

But what if they don't? What if they deny their actions, or make excuses...."she deserved it". But if subconsciously they decide such actions are wrong and never do it again....then the universe has done it's job.

So for your question...it's MUCH more satisfying if we get the apology or get to see karma in action. But if we don't....it still matters.

The dog still barks.

FruitCake said...

a) Please don't give me too much credit - your are the one who made the connection.

b) There is nothing selfish about wishing for an apology. On the other hand, giving others too much power over our lives can be too generous rather than selfish.

c) Did I ever mention that sometimes my behaviour is appalling? Well, although I am an apologiser at heart, I still end up struggling to forgive myself.

A very kind friend once told me that no one will ever be harder on us than we are on ourselves.
Those people who were rude or whatever might - or might not - be struggling to forgive themselves.
They might even be non-apologisers who have nonetheless learnt something. Well, at least we can hope.