Monday, March 9, 2015

Saying and Doing the Wrong Things

A few days ago I wrote about the abortion episode of The Secret Life of Us, where everyone did and said the right things (well, at least within the abortion storyline).

Today I watched an episode, of the same show, where people said and did the wrong things.

Evan made Alex's coffee wrong.

Alex was a total bitch about the coffee being wrong.

Evan teased Richie about becoming famous. Richie (who was actually not becoming so famous) bruised Evan's ribs.  Richie also attacked Jason for the same reason.

So...yeah. On television and in real life people manage to treat each other like shit sometimes.  Often though they still manage to get along.

On the episode I watched today, they fixed things with apologies and a weird laughing yoga group thing at the park.

Everyone makes mistakes. The world isn't perfect. Obviously. If we can recognize our mistakes and apologize, it makes things a little better. Sometimes it makes things a lot better.

Sometimes people don't realize they've said the wrong thing. Or they know they did, but they don't care. Maybe there's a part of them that likes wounding others.  Sometimes people say mean things to test us—see our reaction.  They want to know our threshold for insults. Then, when and if we get angry, they say we're too sensitive or we don't have a sense of humor.

Sometimes people will say the wrong thing, but they feel it's the right thing. They can't understand why we're hurt. They might try to explain their side of things. And sometimes they might apologize, but not because they're really sorry. They're just trying to humor us.

Sometimes people will say or do the wrong thing. They'll feel horrible about it, and apologize. But then they'll keep doing it, because it's in their nature. Unfortunately.

Sometimes people aren't sorry for what they said and did. They think we deserved it and got what was coming to us. Some will be happy to see us squirm and suffer. Others will not be sorry it was said, but will still regret that it all happened. They might not apologize, but they'll do things to show they want better things for us and better things for the relationship.

I don't know what I'm trying to say; and I don't know what else to say.'s just that the world is a huge mess. Sometimes people do things to make it worse. Sometimes people do things to make it better. And then sometimes those who do things to make it worse turn around and make it a little better.