Thursday, April 3, 2014

I Wish I Was More Like Roo Stewart

Roo Stewart
Roo Stewart (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Today I was watching my first daily episode of Home and Away, and I thought about how Roo Stewart might be my perfect role model.

Well, I'm talking about the new and improved Roo Stewart, because she used to be spoiled, selfish, and manipulative. Then some kind of psychological miracle happened, and she became who I wish I could be.

She's nice...almost to everyone.  She sees the good in people and defends them when they're criticized by others.  For example, everyone in town sees Martin Dibble as a Buffoon, but she was willing to go to a dance with him.  People say vile things about her Aunt Morag, and well...there's a lot of vile things to say about Aunt Morag.  Roo acts sympathetic towards their anger regarding Morag but manages to still see and promote the positive traits she sees in her aunt.

The thing I love most, though, is that although Roo's very kind, she's not a doormat.  She definitely has a backbone.  She doesn't repress her emotions.  If someone gives her a hard time, she speaks her mind.  If someone gives someone else a hard time, she'll speak her mind.  She fights for herself, and she fights for others.

She's also very forgiving.  Her father and stepmother accused her of writing poison pen letters that she didn't write. Eventually, she forgave them for the false accusations; though originally she vowed she never would.  I don't blame her, and it made her seem more human.  If she forgave them immediately, it would be too unrealistic.  

Roo gave up her infant daughter for adoption.  Later, she learns her former enemy Bobbie Fisher is her cousin.  Bobbie's the daughter of Roo's Aunt Morag who abandoned Bobbie at birth.  Bobbie speaks ill of Morag for giving her up when she was a baby.  Bobbie says all this in front of Roo; I suppose forgetting that Roo herself had given up an infant. Roo's hurt by this, but she doesn't lash out or hold a grudge.

Or maybe she did secretly hold a grudge.  Maybe she's just holding it all inside?

I guess that's what I wonder sometimes.

What's going on inside of Roo Stewart?  Well. Yeah.  I know she's a fictional character.  But if she was real, what would she be feeling?

Is she as perfect on the inside as she is on the outside?

I think I'm much nicer on the outside than I am on the inside.  I tend to be nice to people, even when I'm disgusted with them or angry.  But, eventually, I usually explode, and it all comes tumbling out.

I want to learn to speak up for myself when I'm feeling the bad feelings instead of letting it fester and burst.
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