I can't sleep.
I don't know if it's because I took such a long nap, or if it's because I'm scared to fall asleep.
* * *
If I fall asleep, Freddy Krueger might get me.
* * *
I'm bored.
And tired.
And scared.
I'm watching the clock.
And...well, also typing.
* * *
Jack came into the room.
I was so relieved—happy that he was awake.
I hate this nighttime loneliness.
But he wasn't awake.
He was sleepwalking.
I don't think he's ever sleepwalked before.
He said. The glass is breaking. Where are the rabbits? It's leaking.
Before I could ask him what the hell he was talking about, he walked out.
I followed him, after pinching myself like twenty times to make sure this wasn't a dream.
I found him back in bed, asleep.
If I wasn't so scared, I'd probably be amused.
* * *
I fell asleep.
I had another lucid dream.
I think I'm going to end up hating lucid dreams, and they used to be one of my favorite things.
This dream didn't start out in the bed. It started out at a playground. I was playing with my niece and nephew at a playground. My sister then came over and started yelling at me because I ate her piece of pizza.
I realized I was dreaming and the first thing I thought was, Oh good! I've managed to fall asleep!
I felt annoyed though that I was back in Texas, like I had been robbed of part of my Australia trip.
I wished myself back there even though that rarely works for me in my lucid dreams.
I have plenty of lucid dreams where I want to go somewhere, and I want to get there quickly. But It doesn't work.
This time it worked.
I found myself back outside the cabin. I was terrified because I remembered the scary camping people. What if they were still there?
(I no longer believed they were innocent happy dream characters. I guess it's something I can only believe in the daylight, when I'm awake)
I quickly opened the door, stepped into the cabin, and closed the door. I went into my room and saw this computer open. My parents were on the computer screen. They waved hello to me.
I waved back.
My mom said, We're watching you.
Then the screen flickered and a new scene appeared. It was the tent and the camping family. Again their backs were turned to me. I quickly tried to close the browser window, but it wouldn't close. I tried to close the computer, but that was stuck too.
Just as I was about to try running from the room (which I assume would have probably been impossible), the scene on the computer screen changed again.
A little girl sat on the kitchen floor, crying. She had her eyes squeezed shut, and she was holding her ears. Her face was hidden in her knees.
I felt bad for her, but also scared. I wasn't at all afraid of HER though. What scared me was the possibility that I'd have to see the thing that was scaring her.
The little girl lifted her head and looked right at me.
She said. Help me.
Then I woke up.
* * *
I just realized something.
I think maybe the child, on the screen, was my own self as a child.
At least that's what she looked like.
It was really weird.
But kind of cool.
Maybe.
* * *
I fell back asleep at around 6:30 and woke up at 11:00.
I felt bad that I slept so long and missed so much of the day.
Tim asked me if I was feeling okay.
I decided to tell him about the dreams and Jack's weird sleepwalking episode.
He was nice and didn't call the local psychiatric hospital.
He was really sweet actually. He asked me if I wanted to leave. He said we can stay somewhere else.
I didn't give him an answer.
I'm not sure what to do.
It seems silly to leave. I think I'm just overtired and working myself into craziness.
* * *
I feel like I'm in a horror movie.
* * *
We're staying.
Jack loves it here and we have only one more night.
I think we'll be okay.
If a tree comes alive and tries to grab one of us, we'll request an early check out.
* * *
I made a decision.
I decided NOT to try to sleep tonight. Instead I'm going to take a long nap.
My dreams were fine in the morning.
There's something about night here...at least for me.
Tim and Jack haven't had any bad dreams.
So I'll sleep during the day and then stay awake at night.
I'll read a book and/or play Sims 3.
* * *
I managed to sleep. I slept from 3 to 7:30. Jack woke me up. He wanted me to eat dinner with them.
He's worried about me.
I gave him a lot of reassurance.
We had a nice dinner.
Tim made pizza.
I learned that Jack had a fun time playing with the girls again.
I hope Tim and Jack go to bed late tonight. Then there's less time for me to be alone.
That's probably kind of selfish of me.
Oh well.
I think we all have a right to be selfish sometimes.
* * *
I feel bad that I missed the day.
I feel I've missed out on our Snowy Mountain time.
Well, I did have a pretty good day.
At least I got to see the lake and the big trout.
NOTE: This trip journal is fictional. We are not really in Australia. Some stuff in these posts are based on research. Some stuff is based on my reality. Some stuff is based on past experiences. And some stuff is based on fantasy. The non-trip journal posts ARE true and real…except for my dreams (which are written in purple).
Oh...and also....my 2009 trip reports are about a real trip to Australia. That's all true too.
I don't know if it's because I took such a long nap, or if it's because I'm scared to fall asleep.
* * *
If I fall asleep, Freddy Krueger might get me.
* * *
I'm bored.
And tired.
And scared.
I'm watching the clock.
And...well, also typing.
* * *
Jack came into the room.
I was so relieved—happy that he was awake.
I hate this nighttime loneliness.
But he wasn't awake.
He was sleepwalking.
I don't think he's ever sleepwalked before.
He said. The glass is breaking. Where are the rabbits? It's leaking.
Before I could ask him what the hell he was talking about, he walked out.
I followed him, after pinching myself like twenty times to make sure this wasn't a dream.
I found him back in bed, asleep.
If I wasn't so scared, I'd probably be amused.
* * *
I fell asleep.
I had another lucid dream.
I think I'm going to end up hating lucid dreams, and they used to be one of my favorite things.
This dream didn't start out in the bed. It started out at a playground. I was playing with my niece and nephew at a playground. My sister then came over and started yelling at me because I ate her piece of pizza.
I realized I was dreaming and the first thing I thought was, Oh good! I've managed to fall asleep!
I felt annoyed though that I was back in Texas, like I had been robbed of part of my Australia trip.
I wished myself back there even though that rarely works for me in my lucid dreams.
I have plenty of lucid dreams where I want to go somewhere, and I want to get there quickly. But It doesn't work.
This time it worked.
I found myself back outside the cabin. I was terrified because I remembered the scary camping people. What if they were still there?
(I no longer believed they were innocent happy dream characters. I guess it's something I can only believe in the daylight, when I'm awake)
I quickly opened the door, stepped into the cabin, and closed the door. I went into my room and saw this computer open. My parents were on the computer screen. They waved hello to me.
I waved back.
My mom said, We're watching you.
Then the screen flickered and a new scene appeared. It was the tent and the camping family. Again their backs were turned to me. I quickly tried to close the browser window, but it wouldn't close. I tried to close the computer, but that was stuck too.
Just as I was about to try running from the room (which I assume would have probably been impossible), the scene on the computer screen changed again.
A little girl sat on the kitchen floor, crying. She had her eyes squeezed shut, and she was holding her ears. Her face was hidden in her knees.
I felt bad for her, but also scared. I wasn't at all afraid of HER though. What scared me was the possibility that I'd have to see the thing that was scaring her.
The little girl lifted her head and looked right at me.
She said. Help me.
Then I woke up.
* * *
I just realized something.
I think maybe the child, on the screen, was my own self as a child.
At least that's what she looked like.
It was really weird.
But kind of cool.
Maybe.
* * *
I fell back asleep at around 6:30 and woke up at 11:00.
I felt bad that I slept so long and missed so much of the day.
Tim asked me if I was feeling okay.
I decided to tell him about the dreams and Jack's weird sleepwalking episode.
He was nice and didn't call the local psychiatric hospital.
He was really sweet actually. He asked me if I wanted to leave. He said we can stay somewhere else.
I didn't give him an answer.
I'm not sure what to do.
It seems silly to leave. I think I'm just overtired and working myself into craziness.
* * *
I feel like I'm in a horror movie.
* * *
We're staying.
Jack loves it here and we have only one more night.
I think we'll be okay.
If a tree comes alive and tries to grab one of us, we'll request an early check out.
* * *
I made a decision.
I decided NOT to try to sleep tonight. Instead I'm going to take a long nap.
My dreams were fine in the morning.
There's something about night here...at least for me.
Tim and Jack haven't had any bad dreams.
So I'll sleep during the day and then stay awake at night.
I'll read a book and/or play Sims 3.
* * *
I managed to sleep. I slept from 3 to 7:30. Jack woke me up. He wanted me to eat dinner with them.
He's worried about me.
I gave him a lot of reassurance.
We had a nice dinner.
Tim made pizza.
I learned that Jack had a fun time playing with the girls again.
I hope Tim and Jack go to bed late tonight. Then there's less time for me to be alone.
That's probably kind of selfish of me.
Oh well.
I think we all have a right to be selfish sometimes.
* * *
I feel bad that I missed the day.
I feel I've missed out on our Snowy Mountain time.
Well, I did have a pretty good day.
At least I got to see the lake and the big trout.
NOTE: This trip journal is fictional. We are not really in Australia. Some stuff in these posts are based on research. Some stuff is based on my reality. Some stuff is based on past experiences. And some stuff is based on fantasy. The non-trip journal posts ARE true and real…except for my dreams (which are written in purple).
Oh...and also....my 2009 trip reports are about a real trip to Australia. That's all true too.
You have a good imagination or weird dreams.
ReplyDeleteDiane B,
ReplyDeleteThanks.
I think I have both; and they go hand in hand.