Contraditions

I was about to shut off my light and go to sleep when I realized my two earlier posts totally contradict each other.

In the first post, I said I hoped it was a lone gunman instead of a terrorist thing.

In the second post, I talked about being annoyed at people for inferring that a lone gunman is not as scary as a terrorist.

I feel I should point out my own stupidity and weakness of conviction before someone comes along to do it for me.

For now, I'll have to agree more with the me who wrote the second post.

I'm trying to understand the me who wrote the first.  I'm failing. Why would I prefer a lone gunman to a terrorist?  One human with one gun can kill many people.

Or is the first me right? Is a terrorist attack more frightening?

Maybe the idea I had was that it could go way beyond the chocolate shop. Maybe I imagined the whole city of Sydney under siege.

But if I had a loved one in the chocolate shop, I don't know if it would matter to me personally who, what, or why all this was happening...or how big it might get. I would just want to know if my beloved was coming home to me.

So I'm going to take back what I said about hoping it's a lone gunman.  I hope whoever it is has a bigger bark than bite.  I hope everyone survives.

There will always be hate, but I hope it's overshadowed by love.