Thursday, July 22, 2010

Flying Boats And That Feeling

A while back I wrote about these special dreams I've had that give me a certain feeling.

It's so hard to describe the feeling, but it's definitely a positive type feeling. It's like a tingly warm happy excited type thing.

These types of dreams are rare for me. One of them was extra special, even though I hardly remember it. There's just a sense of eating breakfast, blue water, and a swimming race. Later, when my interest in Australia started blooming, I began to believe it had something to do with Sydney Harbour. I don't know if I have some kind of spiritual connection to Sydney, OR if I pushed myself to believe there was a connection...well, because I wanted to put spiritual meaning into my profound weirdness.

Here's something I like about the story though. Because my dream might have involved a swimming race in the harbour, I was interested in the Sydney Harbour swimming race. I usually don't give much of a crap about sporting events, But this was different for me. Now I didn't care enough to arrange our whole Australia trip around it, but it somehow ended up that we'd be in Sydney during the race. Yeah. I think we made the plans, and then I realized we'd be there during the race.


The night before the race, I had an awful night. It was one of those times where I create a drama, and then hate myself for it. In the morning, I walked alone to the race. Walking there made me feel a little better. I can't say the actual race made me feel good though. There was a creepy Ronald the McDonald clown; I felt lonely because everyone else had family and friends with them; and I could barely see the swimmers. It was definitely NOT the magical thing of my dreams.

The thing is though after the race was AWESOME. It was one of the best days of my life. In fact, I wrote a blog post about all of it called Day which I have one of the best days of my whole life. It's pretty much the same story I'm telling here, but a longer and more detailed version.

I like that idea that one of the best days of my life contained a swimming race that I went to because it reminded me of one of the best dreams of my life.

Here I am rambling along with stories I've already told before.

I guess I feel I need to explain all that again before saying that I watched a video clip on the Australian Screen site that gave me THAT feeling. Sometimes I'll get the feeling outside of my dream....I guess when something reminds me of the dreams.

The video clip is from 1938. It's an airplane on Sydney Harbour. The part that gives me that feeling is at 1:48. Why? I don't know. Is it something about a plane on water? Is it something about that particular view of the harbour?

I don't know.

And by now, I'm pretty much at peace with the not-knowing....well, for the most part.