Monday, January 23, 2012

Our Pretend Australia Trip Day 14 Adaminaby

I woke up too early this morning. It's quarter to six.

I should go out and watch the sunrise, but I'm feeling too lazy.

I had a crazy dream.

We were in a cabin.  I was using the toilet.  I flushed and it started overflowing. I screamed, not wanting my poo to go all over the place.  I looked around for a plunger and didn't see one.  I ran out of the bathroom and saw crocodiles everywhere.  

I called out for Tim's help, but he didn't answer.

Then I woke up.

Now I'm here.

Should I try to fall back asleep?

The good news is the toilet here is working fine.

I don't know what's more scary, overflowing toilets or crocodiles in the hallway.

Well....I'd say it was about even.

* * *

Wished I could get back to sleep.

I guess maybe I'll sleep in the car...if I'm not too terrified.  We're driving into the mountains.    Hopefully there won't be any twisty steep roads.  I hate those.

* * *

Tried to fall back asleep and failed.

I had some deep thoughts, though.

I thought about how I beat myself up yesterday for getting emotional when Tim complimented me.

How can I wish for more compliments and support when it turns me into an emotional mess?

It's not the first time it has happened to me.   I have times where an email-pal says something sweet and I burst into tears.  I wish I could say they're happy tears, but they're often followed by a strange type of melancholy.

But then I started thinking....

I'm not like that with all compliments and supportive messages. I have a few people in my life who give me a regular dose of Jack.  He so often says sweet and supportive things, and he laughs like crazy when I do my silly voices for him.  That makes me feel so wonderful. When I'm with him, I feel I'm talented enough to win an Oscar.

His sweetness doesn't make me an emotional mess because he provides me with a steady dose of it.  

* * *

Ate some cookies for breakfast.

I should be ashamed of myself.

I'm not.

At least not for that.

* * *

Thought I should take the doses of support I get from those who are generous with such things and apply that to a general account.

That would probably work well for me.

I'm not sure how to go about doing that.

I'll try.....

* * *

Tim and Jack are awake.

I feel like going back to bed.

By the time I fall asleep though, it'll be time to check out.

* * *

We're in Adaminaby now.

We survived the ride!  There were a few scary moments; but for the most part it wasn't too extremely horrible.

I got a little bit of sleep.

We stopped in a town called Tumut and had Thai food.  

Jack had a calamari kids meal.  Tim and I shared a stir-fry that had vegetables, ginger, and cashews.   It was delicious, but now I feel bloated.

We're staying in a place called Windradeen.   We have two bedrooms, a living area, and a kitchen!    This is very nice.  I think we've all gotten tired of being cramped into one room.

* * *

Thought of something really weird.

It's probably just my imagination.

When we came into the cabin, it felt so familiar to me.

I thought about it for awhile and I kind of think this cabin is the one I dreamed about last night.

There's nothing specific. I'm not good at remembering the setting in my dreams. I get only a vague sense of things.

I just have this...FEELING.    

Now I've looked at pictures of the cabin before coming here.   I did that when Tim and I went through the process of booking places.   But I saw so many photos of accommodations.   The places we stayed at in Sydney, Canberra, and Wagga Wagga didn't look familiar to me when we got there.

And we've even been to the Hyde Park hotel.   We went into the room with our friends at one point.  They were staying there. I think they wanted to drop something off?

Despite seeing the hotel in person, it didn't feel familiar to me when we returned to it.

I don't know what to think.

I should probably just be rational and remember that I have an overactive imagination.

I won't worry about it.

As long as we're not bombarded with crocodiles, we should be fine.

* * *

Remembered the toilets.

I hope nothing goes wrong there either.

* * *

We're going to go grocery shopping.

There's a store pretty close to here.  

* * *

We're back.

We have food now—lots of it.

I stress about it going to waste, but we can take the nonperishable with us.  

Now I'm trying to figure out sleeping arrangements.

Jack usually sleeps in the same room with us.  Now we have the extra room.   In the past, we've usually squished onto the bed even when there's a room of extra beds.  But Jack's getting bigger and it's too squishy to all squeeze onto a Queen bed.

I have a feeling Jack will be nervous about sleeping in a room alone.

I'll volunteer to do it. I kind of like the idea of having my own room. Then Tim and Jack can have some boy-bonding time.

* * *

Talked to Jack.  He says he doesn't mind sleeping in the other room.

I suggested we trade off.

Tonight I'll sleep there, tomorrow he'll sleep there, and the third night, Tim will sleep there.  

* * *

Jack and I just got back from playing outside.

We played tag.

We walked while playing Twenty Questions.  

We looked at cows.

We saw Magpies.

We heard and saw an Australian Raven.  They make such strange sounds.  

The weather is lovely.  

I think I could grow to love it here.

* * *

We went back outside.

We met one of the other families that's staying here.

There are three girls. The oldest is Jack's age.

All three girls have super adorable Australian accents.

I LOVE it here.

* * *

The little girls just knocked on our door and asked Jack to play!

I'm so excited for him.

And I'm very happy that he wanted to go.

Jack has times where he's very social, but he also has time for he's very weary of new kids.

Now I just have to ignore my fears of kidnappings and other mysterious types of disappearances, so I don't act like the overprotective mother. 

I wish I could act like a mom of the 20th century, but I'm very much a mom of the paranoid 21st century.

Jack is not a free range least not on a regular basis.

* * *

Jack has been gone for ten minutes.

I'm trying to concentrate on my book.

* * *

It's been 25 minutes now.

I'm not doing well concentrating on my book.

* * *

When we were in Port Stephens we let Jack be free some degree.

He got lost and a dad brought him back to me.  Jack was crying. I felt horrible.

* * *

I need to remember that Jack was six then.   Now he's ten.

* * *

It's been 30 minutes now.

* * *

I can't stop thinking of The Lovely Bones.

I'm going out to check on him.

* * *

I found him right away.

Everything's good.

Everything's wonderful.

He was having a great time with the girls.

But he didn't mind me coming to check on him.

The mom of the girls came by a few minutes after me.

I confessed about being nervous, expecting her to laugh at me.   Instead she said she's the exact same way!

We talked about how society has changed so much when we were kids.

Our parents gave us so much freedom.  

* * *

Tim gave me another compliment.

He said I was good at trip planning.

That was very sweet of him.

I gave him compliments on his cooking.  He made his WONDERFUL burritos.  I've really missed eating Chef Tim food. 

I think I compliment Tim a lot on his cooking.   Or at least I try too.

Sometimes I feel like I'm being nice to someone, but then they say otherwise, and I get all confused.

Tim once told me I rarely compliment his cooking and my sister once told me I never say nice things about her parenting.    I thought I did.  I don't know. Maybe I just compliment them inside my head, and I imagine I said it aloud.

The only thing is, a short time after Tim said that, I complimented Tim on his cooking.  It wasn't premeditated.   It just popped out of my mouth.   And I didn't get the sense that I had done something rare.  It felt very natural.   It felt very much like something I do quite often.

I'm very stingy when it comes to my time.  And I'm a little stingy when it comes to sharing food.   But I don't think I'm stingy with compliments.   I think I'm usually pretty generous with that.

BUT who knows. I may very well be delusional about all of that.  

* * *

We had a yummy dessert.

We had ice-cream and Tim made a strawberry sauce.

He really is a fantastic chef.

He deserves a lot of compliments on that.

* * *

The toilet made a weird growling type sound when I flushed.

My heart started pounding.

But everything ended up being okay.

 NOTE:  This trip journal is fictional.   We are not really in Australia.  Some stuff in these posts are based on research.  Some stuff is based on my reality.  Some stuff is based on past experiences. And some stuff is based on fantasy.   

The non-trip journal posts ARE true and real…except for my dreams (which are written in purple). 
Oh...and 2009 trip reports are about a real trip to Australia.  That's all true too.