Hi!
Are you feeling feeling moderately comfortable in your life?
Are you sleeping fairly well?
Are you getting the feeling that your life might be a bit too...okay?
Well, if you have a narcissist in your life, you're in luck! Follow these few steps, and I can get you feeling that there's a persistent dark cloud hanging over your head. You'll lose a ton of sleep! I guarantee it. You might even start feeling like the world is ending.
So...here we go.
1. Open up that vulnerable part of you that loves your narcissist and believes they can change.
2. Interact with your narcissist. This can be done via telephone, text, video chat, email, or even face to face. But very important! You MUST drop the gray rock act! You need to open up to your narcissist. Tell them something personal. Maybe tell them about a struggle you're having. Share a video that means something to you. Tell them about a worry you have. Tell them about something you're excited about.
3. Wait for a response. Now there's a very small chance that your attempt will fail. Your narcissist might say something supportive. They might actually seem to be listening. They might even seem to care. But don't worry. All hope is not lost. BECAUSE this will make it even easier for you to return to step 1 or step 2 at a later date.
If things go as expected, though, you're on your way to stress and despair. Your narcissist will likely say something that makes you feel they don't care about you and/or they don't listen to you. Your narcissist will make you feel you're not interesting enough; that your accomplishments aren't enough; or your problems and worries are trivial. Basically, they'll make you feel small.
4. Very important. Do NOT ignore what the narcissist says, and do not try to change the subject. Let the narcissist know that they have hurt you and that you're angry at them. Not only that, but try to point out to the narcissist that they're a narcissist. You can just directly say, You're such a narcissist. Or you can just use keywords and phrases like "playing victim", "bragging", "manipulation", "dark triad" "sadistic" etc.
You can even go as far as comparing them to Donald Trump. Although this would probably work better if they're a Democrat (or other similar creature)
5. Now sit back and experience the fruits of your labor. At least half of the following is almost guaranteed to happen.
A) Your narcissist will remind you of how much they've given you.
B) Your narcissist will remind you how much they've done for you.
C) Your narcissist will tell you that they have many fans...so yeah, there must be something wrong with YOU.
D) Your narcissist will bring up some charitable work they have done or a large charitable contribution they have made.
E) Your narcissist will label you as abusive.
F) Your narcissist will give you a fauxpology
G) Your narcissist will throw other people under the bus...if desperate enough.
H) Your narcissist will reach out to someone close to you and tell them how you're incredibly awful.
I) Your narcissist will allude to the fact that they're going to die someday and how you'll regret how you treated them.
J) The narcissist will compare themselves to rapists, deadbeat dads, serial killers, kidnappers, or torturers to prove to you that you're lucky to have them.
K) Your narcissist will tell you that they love you, and they're very worried for your mental health.
If you get at least one of these, congratulations. I'm sure you'll be biting your nails, doing a little binge-eating, pulling out a few strands of your hair, etc.
If you get even more...awesome. Good job! Mission accomplished. I bet you're no longer feeling okay with yourself and the world.
Now take a step back and bask in your feelings of disappointment, insecurity, stress, low self-esteem, and hopelessness.
The problem is, I can't guarantee these feelings will last. In a few days, weeks, or months you might start to feel okay again. This is especially true if you have an outlet for your feelings—a journal or a friend you can vent to. Or.... if you have access to reading material that makes you see that your feelings and reactions are typical for people in your situation. Well if you read that kind of stuff, you're likely to feel that though you're damaged, you're not a totally shitty person. And you'll feel less alone.
So if you do that kind of stuff...or you just let time do it's healing, don't worry. When you're ready to feel awful again, just start over at step 1.
Are you feeling feeling moderately comfortable in your life?
Are you sleeping fairly well?
Are you getting the feeling that your life might be a bit too...okay?
Well, if you have a narcissist in your life, you're in luck! Follow these few steps, and I can get you feeling that there's a persistent dark cloud hanging over your head. You'll lose a ton of sleep! I guarantee it. You might even start feeling like the world is ending.
So...here we go.
1. Open up that vulnerable part of you that loves your narcissist and believes they can change.
2. Interact with your narcissist. This can be done via telephone, text, video chat, email, or even face to face. But very important! You MUST drop the gray rock act! You need to open up to your narcissist. Tell them something personal. Maybe tell them about a struggle you're having. Share a video that means something to you. Tell them about a worry you have. Tell them about something you're excited about.
3. Wait for a response. Now there's a very small chance that your attempt will fail. Your narcissist might say something supportive. They might actually seem to be listening. They might even seem to care. But don't worry. All hope is not lost. BECAUSE this will make it even easier for you to return to step 1 or step 2 at a later date.
If things go as expected, though, you're on your way to stress and despair. Your narcissist will likely say something that makes you feel they don't care about you and/or they don't listen to you. Your narcissist will make you feel you're not interesting enough; that your accomplishments aren't enough; or your problems and worries are trivial. Basically, they'll make you feel small.
4. Very important. Do NOT ignore what the narcissist says, and do not try to change the subject. Let the narcissist know that they have hurt you and that you're angry at them. Not only that, but try to point out to the narcissist that they're a narcissist. You can just directly say, You're such a narcissist. Or you can just use keywords and phrases like "playing victim", "bragging", "manipulation", "dark triad" "sadistic" etc.
You can even go as far as comparing them to Donald Trump. Although this would probably work better if they're a Democrat (or other similar creature)
5. Now sit back and experience the fruits of your labor. At least half of the following is almost guaranteed to happen.
A) Your narcissist will remind you of how much they've given you.
B) Your narcissist will remind you how much they've done for you.
C) Your narcissist will tell you that they have many fans...so yeah, there must be something wrong with YOU.
D) Your narcissist will bring up some charitable work they have done or a large charitable contribution they have made.
E) Your narcissist will label you as abusive.
F) Your narcissist will give you a fauxpology
G) Your narcissist will throw other people under the bus...if desperate enough.
H) Your narcissist will reach out to someone close to you and tell them how you're incredibly awful.
I) Your narcissist will allude to the fact that they're going to die someday and how you'll regret how you treated them.
J) The narcissist will compare themselves to rapists, deadbeat dads, serial killers, kidnappers, or torturers to prove to you that you're lucky to have them.
K) Your narcissist will tell you that they love you, and they're very worried for your mental health.
If you get at least one of these, congratulations. I'm sure you'll be biting your nails, doing a little binge-eating, pulling out a few strands of your hair, etc.
If you get even more...awesome. Good job! Mission accomplished. I bet you're no longer feeling okay with yourself and the world.
Now take a step back and bask in your feelings of disappointment, insecurity, stress, low self-esteem, and hopelessness.
The problem is, I can't guarantee these feelings will last. In a few days, weeks, or months you might start to feel okay again. This is especially true if you have an outlet for your feelings—a journal or a friend you can vent to. Or.... if you have access to reading material that makes you see that your feelings and reactions are typical for people in your situation. Well if you read that kind of stuff, you're likely to feel that though you're damaged, you're not a totally shitty person. And you'll feel less alone.
So if you do that kind of stuff...or you just let time do it's healing, don't worry. When you're ready to feel awful again, just start over at step 1.
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