Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Just Say Something Because It's Not That Hard

Some people wonder why I disabled comments on my blog.

I think they missed my little online outburst.

Here be the story:   

I didn't disable because of what anyone said.  I disabled the comments because of what was NOT said.  I was sick of writing stuff that I think deserved a response and not hearing anything. 

What did I want to hear?   

Simple things like I hope you feel better.  I'm sorry you're sad.  Have a nice vacation.  Happy Thanksgiving.  Glad you had a fun time on your trip. 

The extreme lack of statements like this greatly annoyed me, so I decided if I disabled comments, I could simply IMAGINE people were saying them.

Why is it hard for people to say simple nice things?  I don't get it.

Sometimes I think, well maybe I'm not important enough to warrant such comments. What if it's just that there's more serious and important things in the world?   My problems are trivial.   My vacations aren't interesting enough to people. Whatever. Maybe if I had something HUGE to report, people would speak up.

Today, someone on Facebook reminded me so much of myself and my attitude towards things.  Her family is going through a major traumatic ordeal right now.  She wrote a post telling people that she reads and appreciate all the comments she receives. And she GETS a lot of them, fortunately.   From what I can see most people have been extremely supportive. But she also pointed out that she also notices that certain people don't say anything. They make no acknowledgment of what her family is going through.

It makes me so angry and sad that people are like this.  It's bad enough to ignore me with my somewhat trivial and vain issues but to ignore a family going through a gigantic health crisis? That is SO wrong.   

Someone defended these people saying that they likely DO care. They just don't know what to say.

I think that's a crap excuse.  It's really NOT that hard.  All they have to do is say something simple like I'm praying for you.   Not religious?  How about I'm thinking of you guys.  They could also say Sorry you're going through this difficult time.

Really.  The simpler the better. The more someone rambles on, the more likely that they'll end up saying something that's almost as worse as the silence.

Anyway, if anyone wants to do me a big favor today, I'd greatly appreciate it.

Please....reach out to someone.  RESPOND.  If you're on Facebook, and someone says My grandma died, tell them you're sorry for their loss. If someone posts that they just barfed all over the kitchen, tell them you hope they feel better. If someone says they got an A on a difficult test, say something like, Awesome!   Good job.   

If you're not on Facebook, you can do all this elsewhere.  Comment on someone's blog. Say something supportive to someone in person.  Respond to an email.


If you already do stuff like that, and I'm singing to the choir.....GOOD!  Glad to have people like you in this world.